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God Says Wait, Biology Explains Why

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Life issues, Parenting & Education, Relationships, Sexy or holy?, tagged , , , , , on March 30, 2012| 1 Comment »

I often hear: “Your faith is a good thing… but, you should keep it separate from real life.”

So, I must ask: Of what good is faith in something if it can’t be used to make a positive difference in the world?

Biblical faith is useful because it pairs perfectly with science to protect vulnerable life.  In this case, I’m talking about adolescents and teens.  My faith tells me their lives are valuable.  Faith compels me to post this blog.  It is science that explains why.

Science tells me that the body and mind – intricately woven together — are in need of protection.  Faith tells me that parents are the best defenders of their child’s body, mind (and soul).  Planned Parenthood and local “teen pregnancy prevention coalitions” have concerned themselves with teen pregnancies.  When my sons were in high school (they now father their own children), comprehensive sex education was believed to be the answer:  “If we can give as much information as possible starting at early ages, then adolescents and teens would be able to make better choices.”  Twenty-five years later, we have an epidemic of sexually transmitted diseases, diminished respect for self and others, emotional anguish, and increased teen pregnancies.

It’s not lack of information that’s the problem.  It’s lack of judgment.

Faith and science explain why:

1) Children need parents to protect them from themselves.  The prefrontal cortex (PFC) of the brain is not fully developed or functioning until the late teens or mid-twenties.  The PFC is responsible for the executive functions of judging, reasoning, decision-making, suppressing impulses, and weighing the consequences of actions.  However, the amygdala, or “feeling” and emotional part of the brain is functioning early in life.

2) Daughters need their dad’s appropriate love and set boundaries.  They  need their dads to explain why they are worth waiting for.  A girl’s mind and body just aren’t ready for sex.  An immature cervix has only one layer of protective cells to guard against infection; a mature cervix has 20-30 layers.  The risk for a life-long disease or even sterility is too high.  (Not to mention the psychological damage of relational bonding, un-bonding, bonding, and un-bonding.)

3) Adolescents need help with self-restraint.  In “cool” conditions, children can appear to have excellent thinking.  For example, in the classroom a boy may say, “Sure, I’ll wait to be sexually active,” or “I’ll remember to use a condom.”  But, “cool” conditions are not the real world.   Place that same boy in the “hot” environment of an unsupervised party with a “sexy” girl looking for love and, well, his emotions hijack his ability to think and be self-controlled.

More information on sex isn’t the answer.  Nor is letting children “decide for themselves.” The answer is a distraction from sex and help with putting on the brakes.

God says wait; biology explains why.

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In the Eye of the Storm

Posted in Faith & Practice, Life issues, Relationships, tagged , , , , on March 8, 2012| 3 Comments »

On March 2, my husband and I flew from Phoenix to Chicago.  There, we awaited the only flight being allowed into Cincinnati that afternoon.  A wicked storm system was building and air traffic was in turmoil.  Two of the three flights to Cincinnati were canceled.  There were rumors that a half hour window of good weather would allow our plane to make its way to our destination. 

Of course, we were anxious.  We didn’t want to be stranded at O’Hare.  We wanted to safely travel to northern Kentucky to be with our younger son and daughter-in-law for the baptism of their second child, our first granddaughter.  Joining us would be our oldest son, daughter-in-law, and three grandsons.  Our granddaughter’s other grandparents and great-grandfather would be gathering with us.  Oh, to greet newborn Kate and witness her becoming a new person in Christ.  Little did we know that we would all be gathering in the eye of the storm

Our sure and steady pilot did, indeed, find a “hole” in the gathering storm clouds.  We landed, disembarked, and within fifteen minutes heard sirens.  Someone said the airport was being evacuated.  Security guards told us to move away from the windows and take cover.  A tornado had been sighted.  No one knew what to do.  Where was a vulnerable person supposed to find shelter in a massive, glass-encased building?  I remember feeling no fear.  Perhaps it was foolish, but my husband and I decided to do the best we could and proceed with our original plan.  We went outside and hailed the shuttle bus to the car rental site.  The driver was calm.  Yes, he was listening to radio reports and storm warnings; nevertheless, he, too, proceeded forward.  There were no other travelers standing in line to rent a car but us.  The woman behind the counter kept glancing out the window, yet continued filling out papers, saying, “Let me get you on your way.  Here.  For no additional charge, take the bigger car parked out front.  It will be safer in the wind.” 

Once in the car, my husband and I navigated away from the airport and to our hotel.  There was only one moment when the uncertainty seemed to elevate emotions.  The moment passed and we found ourselves approaching the hotel just as the sun appeared from behind dissapating clouds.  Our uncertainty and concern had not been only for ourselves.  Kate, her parents, and her big brother, Max, were also in the eye of the storm.  Our son stood watch at the window, ready to lead his family to the basement if necessary.  Our oldest son and daughter-in-law with their three sons were due in Louisville within an hour or so of us.  Later, we learned that some of the greatest destruction was a few miles north of Louisville.  But, our family was spared.

Which of us knows when or where we will be in the eye of the storm?  Each day of life can bring with it uncertainties.  Difficulties.  Disappointments.  The need to adjust plans.  Make quick decisions.  Face fearful situations head on.  There can be a calm in the eye of the storm.  Life experiences have proven to me that while I may move away from God, He never moves away from me.  He often shows Himself most clearly when everything around me is swirling and supposedly out of control.

I thank my Heavenly Father for safely bringing baby Kate’s family to gather at her baptismal font.  In the challenges of her life, may Jesus Christ be her Rock.  Confidence.  Peace that passes all understanding.  May the Holy Spirit who has begun a good work in her give her wisdom and courage in the face of fear. 

Or in the eye of the storm.

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Women, Sex & Health Care

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Culture Shifts, Life issues, Parenting & Education, Relationships, Sexy or holy?, Vocation, tagged , , , , , on February 23, 2012| 2 Comments »

There is a stage being set.  I see male and female players, but focus on those of my own gender.  Why?  Because the way we women choose to play our role determines much for men and children.  Our character matters.   Each woman being called on stage is a daughter of Eve.  Each one is prompted with one question.  “Did God really say . . . ?”  So far in my lifetime, I have heard many responses.

“We are not created, but self-evolved!” proclaim deceived women.  “We are unbound sexual beings with the right to express our sensuality and seek pleasure.  Our daughters must be made comfortable with their sexuality.  Give them all knowledge and they will choose well.”

“We are no different from men,” proclaim foolish women, “and entitled to an equal playing field.  Men do not have to bear children, nor should we.”

“We have the right,” proclaim restless women, “to unlimited access to birth control and abortion.”

Deceived, foolish, and restless women have difficulty holding men accountable as faithful husbands.  Devoted fathers of their children.  Laborers who work for honest pay.   Builders of vibrant community.

When the act of sex is disconnected from procreation, an entire culture pays the price.  Everything – from the family to the economy, from ethics to health care – is affected.

Choosing to follow after the sensual lifestyle because “it’s who I am” comes with tremendous cost to society.  There are pills before sex and after sex.  Pills to fight infection.  Pills to fertilize life or abort life.  Fearing they may lose their “sexual freedom,” women cry out, “Do not come between me and my right to health care.”  In fact, “whether the conscience of my neighbor is good with my lifestyle or not, they must help fund my pills and procedures.”

The stage is set for Election Day.  Do you see the lines forming?  “Stand here, if you’re in favor of women’s health!”  “Over there, if you don’t give a wit.”  Backstage are powers and principalities busy pitting women against men, parents against children, a people against God.

Well, I give a wit.  But, my conscience can’t embrace the funding of Planned Parenthood or health care that mandates religious institutions to cover abortion-causing drugs.  Nor can my conscience turn away from deceived and restless women.  They may speak in one trained voice: “My body, my choice.”  They may be loud.  Bold.  Impassioned.  But, loud, bold, and impassioned voices can be a cover for unhappiness.  Fear.  Discontent.

Knowing this, I am compelled – mercifully compelled – to take a stand for women.  Not for our foolish and hurtful choices, but for women of character who are needed by men.  Children.  A nation.

Because God really did say there is a way that is right.  A way with blessings.  A future.  Hope.

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No Heckling Someone Different

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Identity, Life issues, Parenting & Education, Relationships, tagged , , , , , on January 28, 2012| 5 Comments »

“Myinnermostthinking” responded recently to “Religion, Sex & Biology.”  It would seem that he wants very much for his god to approve his chosen lifestyle.  Christian or not, how many times do any of us try to make God in our image?  Tell ourselves that He, the Creator of life, would certainly accept our self-shaped world… and make us happy in it.  Imagine that!  The pot telling the Potter the way things should be.

Taking the time to respond may not be as productive as I’d like because “Myinnermostthinking” and I don’t speak the same language.  I trust that the Word of God is what God says it is.  “Myinnermostthinking” does not.  Regardless, I’d like to take a stab at this.

Three women, so far, have responded to “Myinnermostthinking.”  What strikes me about their responses is that none of them are heckling a man who thinks and lives very different from them.   Each one of these women have uttered not a single word that could be interpreted as “hate speech.”  Each one has taken the time to study God’s Word and respond in a way that honors that Word.  Each one has responded to a person different from them with patience, kindness, and words of hope.

These women speak from a worldview “Myinnermostthinking” seems to reject.  It is the worldview that determines how I identify myself and make the choices I make.  That worldview — the Biblical worldview — is this: Creation — The Fall — Redemption.  That worldview explains the origin of my life, why things go wrong in my life, and where I’m going when this life is over.  The Biblical worldview trusts that God really did say what He said, when He said it, to whom He said it, and why.

There is one thing that I would like to clarify based on this worldview.  There is a fine line between saying God created us the way we are and saying that He allows us to be the way we are.  MommyLiberty stated that, personally, she thinks “God did allow for some people to be straight and some people to be gay . . . some to be prone to addiction and others not . . . some to struggle with anger, pride, gossip and worry.”  My husband appreciated her husband’s observation: “He gave everybody a different car to drive.  Some  people’s cars are harder than others’ to steer.”  🙂  But, here’s the thing.

God’s original creation was perfect.  Happily, joyfully perfect.  Anything imperfect, unhappy, or without joy is the opposite of God.  God would not create us to be in opposition with our own anatomy.  To be tortured by feelings we shouldn’t have.  To be at risk physicially, emotionally, and spiritually.  But, after the first man and woman sinned, everything changed.  The relationship between God and His creation changed.  The relationship between men and women changed.  We live in a sinfully changed world.  A struggling world.  An unhappy world.  Unhappy, not because God doesn’t want us to be happy, but because we keep doing the things that put us at odds with Him.   Hetero.  Homo.  Bi.  Trans.  Focusing on our “sexuality,” our flesh side, we are hard pressed to find happiness.   Because of sin, we all die. 

But God, in spite of sin, chooses life.  He allowed Adam and Eve to go on living.  He allowed them to do so, — not by changing His design and intent for them, not by throwing all warnings and caution aside — but by mercifully covering their new emotions of embarrassment and shame.  Never before had their nakedness embarrassed them.  Never before had they felt shame.  God covered their embarrassment with clothing (neck to knee) and their shame with the promised Robe of Righteousness, the Savior Jesus Christ.  All of the Old Testament points to the Christ who did, indeed, come to be our Robe of Righteousness.  To cover the sins of the world (all of us) and then ask: “Will you follow Me?” 

Jesus Christ died.  Conquered death.  And returned to the right hand of God.  But, God in Christ will return.  Will He find us striving to follow Him… or doing what is right in our own eyes? 

“My ways are not your ways,” says the Lord.  So, I guess it comes down to this: How we see the Lord Jesus — who calls Himself the Word for life — determines how we choose to live.  Do we seek His way to happiness… or our own?

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Religion, Sex & Biology 101

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Citizenship, Culture Shifts, Faith & Practice, Identity, Parenting & Education, Relationships, Vocation, tagged , , , , on January 24, 2012| 18 Comments »

Sex is protectively positioned between religion and biology.  Otherwise… well, let’s take a look.

“The Obama Administration,” writes Chuck Colson, “has decided to promote and emphasize lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered rights – and it is doing so at the expense of everyone’s God-given freedom of religion.”  (Breakpoint 1-17-12)

Colson backs up this strong statement by quoting Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.  In an address entitled “Human Rights Agenda for the 21st Century,” (12-9-09), Clinton said people “must be free to worship, associate, and to love in the way that they choose.”

“Did you catch that?” Colson asks.  “In one sentence, little noticed at the time, Mrs. Clinton showed the Administration’s true priorities.  In one fell swoop, she changed our God-given right to freedom of religion, a public act, to a much more restricted ‘freedom of worship,’ a private act, which any Chinese official could go along with.  At the same time, Mrs. Clinton, speaking for the administration, elevated the quote ‘right to love in the way they choose’ as a fundamental human right.”

Last December, Mrs. Clinton told a gathering of diplomats that “gay rights are human rights, and human rights are gay rights.”  She also said the “most challenging issue arises when people cite religious or cultural values as a reason to violate or not to protect the human right of LGBT citizens.”

President Obama told a pro-gay-rights group, “Every single American – gay, straight, lesbian, bisexual, transgender – every single American deserves to be treated equally before the law.”  Colson rightly asks, “Does that include marriage?”  There are those in this present Administration who have expressed their support of so-called same-sex “marriage.”  This Administration has refused to defend the Defense of Marriage Act.  Where is the threat to religious freedom?  If so-called homosexual “marriage” can be defined as a civil right, then those who oppose it on Biblical grounds could be branded as practicing “sexual discrimination.”

So, how did we come to this place?  How is it that sexual liberty trumps religious liberty?  That sexual freedom is the one right above all rights?  The one right upon which no one else dare tread?

We were taunted with one question, “Did God really say . . . ?”  We doubted divine creation.  Put ourselves in place of God.  Raised our will above His.  Determined our own identity.   When we see ourselves, first and foremost, as “sexual beings,” then one might assume the right to express that sexuality according to personal preference.  But, God created us to be more than our flesh side.  We are each a soul.  We are created in His image and, though fallen from that perfect image, we are not captive to sexual instincts.  The Savior, Jesus Christ, pulls us out of ourselves and away from harmful choices.  His Spirit equips us to avoid sensuality and, instead, pursue purity and holiness.  Things of God.   When we fail, all is not lost.  We are not destined to despair, but invited to confess.  Ask for forgiveness and help.  Start over.  And over… and over…and over.

A good way to start over is to leave foolishness behind.  We have been too long in “human sexuality” class and not nearly long enough in Biology 101. 

Heterosexual is a biological term describing how a mammalian species reproduces.  The “higher” species reproduces sexually.  The lower invertebrates reproduce asexually.  Therefore, the suffix “sexual” refers to reproduction.  The prefix “homo,” which means “same throughout” with “sexual” is an oxymoron.  Mammals can’t reproduce with two like genders: male with male or female with female.  For the sake of civilization, let’s get our biology straight. 

Who better to consult than the Master of biology.  When He finished speaking animals into existence, God put His hands to work on His greatest masterpiece.  Humans.  He made two genders: male and female.  Count them.  Not three or four or five, but two.  He shaped man, then built woman from man.  He made them equal, but different.  Gender is determined by our anatomy.  (If you’re not sure which one you are, look down.)  An individual male or female, not paired, might be lonely, but they can actually survive without sexual involvement.  However, if they want to continue the human species, they must “fit together.”

God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him” (Genesis 2:18).  “Fit for him,” taken literally, means “like his opposite.”  Do you comprehend this?   Male and female are compatibly different.  Their different anatomy allows husband and wife to “fit together” in order to bring new life into the world.  It is for our physical, emotional, spiritual, and generational health to live as male or female in a way that honors God rather than self. 

God tells man and woman to avoid sexual immorality and sensuality, but never once does He tell us to avoid being male or female.  As a man or a woman, single or married, we have a choice.  We can live in a way that glorifies God and makes the world a better place… or not.

Mock God, Mr. President.  Re-define creation, Mrs. Secretary of State.  Replace freedom of religion with “freedom of worship.”  Disregard biology and let people “love as they choose.”  Claiming to be wise, you lead many on a path of foolishness.

The Holy God stands in contrast.  “My ways are not your ways.”  While we have opportunity, let us speak of holy things.  Oppose foolishness.  “Fit together” in marriage.  Grow children.  Explain what it means to love.  To be human.

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Real Characters, Real History

Posted in Faith & Practice, Identity, Parenting & Education, Relationships, tagged , , , , , on January 14, 2012| Leave a Comment »

Centennial, the 1970s mini-series, is viewed in our house every ten years or so.  It is the movie version of James Michener’s novel and the re-telling of history as he thought it might have happened.   Many of the events are historically accurate, but the characters are fictional.  The loosely woven story has a strong message.  Knowing who we are and from where we come matters.  Each character in history plays a vital role in shaping the present and the future.  Remembering mistakes of the past help us to not repeat them. 

My brother and I have a special interest in the movie because three of our cousins played bit parts with actors Richard Chamberlain, Robert Conrad, and Lynn Redgrave.   There is humor in Centennial.  One easily identifies with this character or that.  There are heroes and villians.  Some powerful emotions are evoked by actions clearly defined as right or wrong.  Hopeful or deadly consequences result.

Centennial is more than just a good movie.  It’s evidence that modern people want a connection with their past.  Their heritage.  Their roots.  Then why, I wonder, do so many modern people reject their history as documented in the Bible? 

The events recorded in Scripture are documented by Jewish and non-Jewish historians.  The characters are real.  The tightly woven historical account has a strong message.  Knowing who we are and from where we come matters.  Adam told of his creation to his sons and grandsons and great-grandsons.  Living long in those days before the flood, a 500-year-old person would have a lot to tell!   Characters in the Old Testament played a vital role in shaping the present and the future.  The brothers of Joseph were so jealous they sold him into slavery, but Joseph became the most powerful man next to Pharoah in Egypt and rescued his family and a nation from famine.  Remembering mistakes of the past help us to not repeat them.  King David murdered so that he might take a fellow soldier’s wife as his own but, before confessing his sin, his bones wasted away and his strength was drained.

There is humor in the Old Testament.  One easily identifies with this character or that.  There are heroes and villians.  Some powerful emotions are evoked by actions that are clearly defined as right or wrong.  Life or death consequences result.

Some people say, “The New Testament speaks to me, but the Old is, well, just old.”  They may say, “I like the story about Jesus.  I like knowing I am loved and, if I sin, have the promise of forgiveness.  I like  knowing that Jesus was a friend of the poor.  That He healed the sick.”   But, every bit of recorded history in the Old Testament leads to and prepares for Jesus Christ.  Without the Old, there is no New.  

Most of us long for a connection to the past.  To know from where we come.  Why we are the way we are and do what we do.  To know hope in each new generation.  That is the reality of the Old and New Testaments of Holy Scripture.  It is the eye-witness account of men and women who knew the Promised Savior before and after His death and resurrection.  They told their children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren… who told us. 

The Bible is His-story:  History.  Real people in history.  Their stories connected to ours.  As real characters connected to His story, we choose to pass it on —  or not.  To connect others to their history — or not.  To tell them who they are and why they matter — or not.

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Living in the Real World

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Identity, Life issues, Relationships, tagged , , , , , on January 9, 2012| 2 Comments »

Megan is an all American girl.  Like other freshmen in college, she considers herself “modern.”  She communicates by iPhone and Facebook, is comfortable with her “sexuality,” strolls through Victoria’s Secret with her boyfriend, and, ready for a serious relationship, scheduled an appointment to discuss birth control with a Planned Parenthood counselor.

Megan also considers herself to be a Christian.  She attended church regularly with her parents.  She was educated in parochial schools.  Her friends are Christian.  She knows the Bible stories and sings praises to God. 

Megan believes Jesus is her Savior.  If you were to ask her if she is a creation of God, she would answer “Yes!”  She has been taught that she can talk to God as if talking to her daddy.  He is “Abba Father” and, Megan has been assured, there is nothing she can do to change this fact.  Even when Megan forgets to pray or skips worship for another activity or sins in any way, God remains her Heavenly Father.  This gives Megan comfort, especially when she’s lonely or troubled.  She adores her “awesome God” on Sundays.  But, on Mondays, she returns to the “real” world.

In the “real” world, Megan was sharing a bed with her boyfriend.  They were in love and being responsibly adult.  Planned Parenthood helped her to separate the act of sex from procreation.  One weekend while visiting her parents, Megan did the usual thing by attending church with them.  But, what happened took Megan by surprise.  This day, the pastor seemed to look right at her.  The Word he spoke did not comfort but, instead, convicted.  Megan heard him say that those who follow the flesh by being sexually immoral, impure, and sensual are in danger of missing heaven (Galatians 5:19-21).  Megan also heard him say that a new person in Christ is equipped to guard against passions and desires (vv. 23-24).

Megan was conflicted.  She did not leave church that morning in a good mood.  What did it mean to be a “new person?”  How did that fit with being a “sexual being” as she had been taught to see herself?  Couldn’t she love Jesus and know He died for her, yet be “modern” in her thinking and behavior?  In an honest moment with her parents, Megan expressed fear.  “I’ve always known God loves me, no matter what.  No matter what, right Dad?  Right, Mom?”  In a way, Megan was asking what so many Christians might be asking themselves: If disobedience or sin cannot make me less God’s child, what does it matter what I do?  Why is it so important to obey God?  Why can’t I just follow my instincts?  Do whatever feels right for me depending on the situation?  Won’t it all work out in the end?  After all, Jesus died so that my sins are forgiven!

This is most certainly true.  Jesus died for a world of sinners.  You.  Me.  Every person ever conceived.  But, dear Megan, our behavior matters.  Why?  Because our behavior changes our attitude toward God.  Evidence of this abounds.  It is seen in a culture that determines for itself what is “right” and “wrong.”  It is the Christian parent who asks the pastor not to speak about the sin of living together lest his daughter co-habitating with her fiancé stops coming to church.  It is the pro-life Christian who has four children but isn’t married to any of their daddies.  It is the Christian woman whose choice of clothing reflects her glory rather than God’s and, intentionally or not, becomes a temptress.  It is the Christian father who, fearing for his daughter’s future, insists she have an abortion.  It is the Christian mother who defends her son’s homosexual lifestyle, saying, “God made him that way.”  It is whole bodies of Christians who want Jesus to wrap Himself around the desires of their hearts. 

The heart, says the world, is good and can be trusted.  The heart, says God’s Word, is deceptive and not to be trusted.   Ah, the fickle human heart!  It is influenced by the world and our own sinful flesh to oppose the Lord God even while it thinks it is still clinging to Him.   

Is Megan doing what we Christians too often do?  She knows she is saved and has the promise of heaven.  But, does she want God to fit her world?  She acknowledges God as her Creator but, depending on her circumstance, does she re-define what He has made?   She says Jesus is her Savior, but does He have anything to say about her relationships and choices?  She finds hope in being a “new person in Christ,” but is she talking and walking like a sinner bound to sin?    

Megan’s identity matters.  She is a child of God because of what Jesus did for her.  She has divine possibilities.  A rich inheritance.   Megan’s behavior also matters.  How does a daughter honor her Father?  How does she reflect His kind of love?  Patience?  Kindness?  Purity?   Megan’s identity as a child of God will never change.  But, her choices and behavior can change her attitude toward God.  Even place her inheritance at risk.

Our identity and behavior matter.  When we separate our God-given identity from the “real” world identity we give ourselves (at any given time, in any given circumstance), we are in danger.  We are in danger when we re-define things of God such as the value of human life, being male or female, purity, and marriage.  We are in danger when we follow instincts of the flesh and stubbornly defend every personal choice.  We are in danger when we exchange His Truth for our opinion.  These are dangerous behaviors that change our attitude toward God.  It is the most dangerous thing of all to make God what we want Him to be.

But, when children of God trust His Word to be living, active, and mighty in “real” life, our perspective of the world changes.  It does not hold us captive.  It is temporary.  It is a place we journey through on our way home to our Father’s Kingdom.  It is opportunity to think, speak, dress, work, play, love, care, and choose in ways that encourage others to ask: “Who is your Father?”  “Why do you do the things you do?” “What is your hope?”

Megan is the King’s daughter with a divine inheritance in store.  This is compelling reason to live a more noble and holy life.  A life with divine possibilities.   A life that reflects God rather than self.  A life that makes a difference in a “real” world.

T2-4Life  is a mentoring ministry that exists to help young ones make choices that 
reflect the holiness of God, but also remind older ones that mistakes of the past do 
not have dominion over changed people in Christ.  You are welcome to visit T2-4Life.

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The Twilight Series

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Parenting & Education, Relationships, tagged , , , , on December 18, 2011| 2 Comments »

Do you have a daughter captivated by the romance of Edward and Bella?  Then you might be interested in an early morning phone call I received a few days ago.  A mother had one question on her mind.  “What do you think about the Twilight series?”  I admitted that I haven’t read the books, but previews of the newly released film have my attention.  “What,” I asked, “concerns you so much that you would call even though we’ve never met?”

With calm reason and logic, she defined Twilight as an example of “deception.”  It’s an attempt to “normalize an aberration,” she noted.  “You’ve pointed out such things in your articles and Titus 2 ministry.”  Twilight, she said, is fantasy — to be sure, but it is also a dangerous mix of the holy and unholy.  I’m frustrated, she confessed because “when I express my concerns to the younger ones in my family, they roll their eyes.” 

Mentoring and warning sons and daughters often receives this kind of response.  Parents may back away from dialogue because they’re described as “unenlightened” or “out of touch.”  This mom, however, was looking for encouragement to press on.  She was well aware of the battle for the hearts and minds of young Christians.   

I’m thankful this mom cared enough to call.  It motivated me to do further research.  I found a discerningly helpful article entitled “The Twilight Series from a Christian Perspective: Part I & II” by Mark Farnham.  Mark is Assistant Professor of Theology and New Testament at Calvary Baptist Theological Seminary in Lansdale, PA.  He and his wife have two teen daughters and a ten-year-old son.  Mark has served as a pastor and director of youth ministries. 

If there is a young woman in your family whose romantic yearnings are teased by Twilight, please take the time to read Mark Farnham’s review.  “The fact that Edward and Bella do not engage in sexual activity seems to be enough to warrant a stamp of approval from  many Christians who defend the series,” writes Mark.  “Some even praise Edward (a vampire) for his considerable restraint in not doing the one thing that is most bodily urgent to him – drinking Bella’s blood.”  But, cautions Mark, “What a work of culture promotes as normal and desirable – or abnormal and undesirable – is the crux of the matter.”  Twilight “drips with sensuality,” writes Mark.  “This aspect of the series should be a major stumbling block for a Christian reader who is attuned to biblical portrayals of holiness and purity.”  (Visit SharperIron to read more.)

Parents, what is Twilight promoting?  What is it compromising?  Might it change a young person’s attitude toward God?  “For Bella,” writes Mark, “God is unnecessary.  Only Edward is necessary.  In her mind, God is only an acceptable thought if He (in whatever form He exists) accepts Edward.  The roles are switched — Edward is supreme and necessary; God is subordinate and contingent.” 

It is spiritually risky business when we fear, love, and trust our self-determined happiness before God.

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Why “I Am A Sexual Being” Puts Us in Danger of Idolatry

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Life issues, Parenting & Education, Relationships, Sexy or holy?, tagged , , , , on November 28, 2011| 2 Comments »

God says: “You shall have no other gods before Me.”  It is His first commandment (Exodus 20:3).  But, when we label ourselves “sexual beings,” we are tempted to put our “sexuality” — our flesh side — before God.

Doubt me?  Take an honest look at the culture.  Only one thing is “holy of holies” above all other things; only one thing is untouchable, my “right,” and to be revered no matter the cost.  That is “human sexuality.”  Beginning early in sex education, children are told: You are a “sexual being.”  Therefore: It is who I am.  It is me.  It is what I do.  It is even my excuse for what I should not do.

Telling ourselves and others (especially children) that we are “sexual beings” is bestowing the wrong identity.  Bestowing the wrong identity, we put ourselves in God’s place.  We call ourselves something that He did not.

God does not identify us as “sexual beings.”  God clearly identifies us a “human beings” or “humankind” or “man created in His own image” (Genesis 1:27).  Reading on, we learn that God created mankind to be “male and female.”  Is this where some Christians get the notion that God made us to be “sexual beings” or to possess “sexuality?”  Well, I don’t think Martin Luther or other church fathers would agree.  Luther writes, “Moses put the two sexes together and says that God created male and female in order to indicate that Eve, too, was made by God as a partaker of the divine image and of the divine similitude, likewise of the rule over everything.  Thus even today the woman is the partaker of the future life, just as Peter says that they are joint heirs of the same grace (1 Peter 3:7).  In the household the wife is a partner in the management and has a common interest in the children and the property, and yet there is a great difference between the sexes.”  (The Lutheran Study Bible, commentary on 1:28, p. 14).  How interesting that Luther did not take this opportunity to proclaim: Look, here, believers!  God has made humans to be sexual beings!  It is who we are!  Luther does, however, point to our real identity: Bearers of God’s divine image.

We do not bear the image of animals.  (Thus, we are not captive to animal instincts.)  We do bear the image of God.  God’s image is holy.  Even though we no longer bear the perfect image of God, He still calls us to holy living!  The kind of living that honors His name and reflects His glory rather than our own.  The kind of living that does not tempt others to sin but, instead, guards both our soul and the soul of our neighbor.

Ahhhh.  Now, we’ve come even closer to our true identity.  We are more than body or mind.  We are spirit, created by God who is Spirit.  We are immortal souls.  “Sexuality” has nothing to do with our souls.  Our souls will live forever.  (In heaven, Jesus tells us, there will be no marriage; in other words, no expression of “sexuality,” no “one flesh union” [Matthew 22:30].)

There is spiritual danger in choosing to identify ourselves as “sexual beings.”  True, we are male or female creations of God.  As male or female believers in the Lord Jesus Christ, we are God’s children.  Even when we fail to act as His children, He is still our Father.  The Father-Child relationship doesn’t change because of our sin.  But, when we sin against God by calling ourselves what He does not; when we focus on ourselves as “sexual beings” and not His children with immortal souls, then our wrong identity shapes our behavior and our behavior changes our attitude toward God.

A changed attitude toward God can dangerously tempt us to put ourselves in the place of God; to, in fact, become our own god.  A god who defines “self” and “sexuality” as being supreme.

The pagan defines himself and lives however he pleases.  But, the believer proclaims: It is God who made us and not we ourselves.  God says: I have called you by name; you are Mine.  In Jesus Christ, God calls us His children.  We are treasured souls bought with a price.  That is our identity.  Anticipating Jesus’ return, “sons” and “daughters” live their lives as male or female: two eyes of the human race.  Both are needed for a clear understanding of life.  It is folly to think of every interaction of male and female as being sexual in nature.  What an abhorrent mess that would be!  Being male and female is not so much sexual as it is the partnering of our complimentary differences to bring glory to God, proclaim Jesus Christ, and affect the culture for good.

Only in marriage does our “flesh side” – our “sexuality” – find its home.  Only in marriage is the “one flesh” union a divine gift to humanity.  It is a power from God.  Who, but the Creator God could join with man and woman to procreate, to bring new life — new body, mind and soul — into existence?  Husband and wife respond to God’s command to “be fruitful and multiply.”  Yes, in the act of sex, male and female are “sexual.”  They procreate sexually.  In Scripture, all things “sexual” pertain to the act of sex.  It is the “will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his (or her) own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like [those] who do not know God”  (1 Thessalonians 4:3-4).  The commentary on verse 4 found in the Lutheran Study Bible brings clarity.  “Our sexuality is God’s gift for use within the parameters of marriage.”  Do you understand what is being said here?  Our gift of sexuality, or the ability to have sex, is reserved for marriage between one man and one woman.  To be male or female, however, is a gift for daily use in glorifying God.  We are not to abstain from being male and female.  We are not to do battle with the attributes of maleness or femaleness, but with “sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry . . . [T]hose who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires” (Galatians 5:19-24).

It matters how we identify ourselves.  It determines our behavior.  It can become the argument for homosexuality.   It can help – or hinder – our neighbor.  It honors – or dishonors – the sanctity of human life.  When we identify ourselves as “sexual,” we may be tempted to give ourselves license; to, in fact, worship and serve ourselves rather than God (Romans 1:24-25).  But, re-created in Christ, male and female identify themselves in a different way.  A Christian’s body is the “temple of the Holy Spirit who enables the believer to turn away from a “sexy” life to a “holy” life.  When we identify ourselves as “holy” and “immortal souls,” we are encouraged to guard the treasure that Jesus bought at tremendous price.  “The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs — heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ” (Romans 8:16-17).

We “are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh” (v 12).  In Christ, our fallen nature has no claim on us.  Our “flesh side” may tempt us, saying: “This is who I am,” or “I owe it to myself,” but we aren’t obligated to obey its impulses or satisfy its desires.  Why?  Because we “did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear” or idolatry.

We cry: “Abba Father!” (v.15)

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Rocky Mountain High

Posted in Faith & Practice, Relationships, tagged , , , , on September 29, 2011| 2 Comments »

Ezerwoman has not written for two weeks.  I’ve been spending time with family and friends in Colorado.  It was a joy to help my uncle with words of encouragement even as he shared words of experience and wisdom with me.  It was a joy to help my older, widowed friend settle into her new home even as we both recognized that “two are better than one.”  The days were long.  There was much pouring out.  But, the Creator re-energizes me with a “Rocky Mountain high.”

Leaving the grand mesa and palisade of vineyards and orchards, I climbed the majesties.  Somewhere between sparkling streams and golden aspens I remembered something a man had told me the day before.  He and his wife had built their house with wrap-around view.  “We just can’t get enough of this.”  I understood what he meant.  I haven’t been able to “get enough” of Colorado since I was a child.  I can’t “get enough,” but neither can I absorb what I see.   That’s how it is with humans.   Our eyes see and say, “I want more,” but our minds can not begin to process creation’s magnificence.

At such times, nothing is more profound than the simple.  Few words are better than many.  “Thank You, God!”

Here is the Source of my “Rocky Mountain high.”   Even while many worship the created, I have the greater privilege of worshipping the Creator.

It is to the Creator God — Father, Son and Holy Spirit — that I entrust my uncle.  My widowed friend.  All.

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