Ezerwoman's Blog

Christina Hoff Sommers is the author of The War Against Boys.  The Ph.D. scholar cites one example after another of how America’s academic, political, and cultural “elite” have maligned and tried to re-define masculinity.

Speaking on behalf of those cultural “elites,” Gloria Steinem said, “We need to raise boys like we raise girls.”  Bear in mind that such convoluted thinking followed the so-called “girlhood project” of the 70s:  Raise girls like boys.  Giving birth to a daughter instead of a son was, for some parents, somewhat of an embarrassment.

On campus and off, workshops, seminars, and projects exist with a sole focus of “transforming” boys.  A “boy’s masculinity” is seen by cultural “elites” as a “problem.”  Despising patriarchy, off-track feminists work feverishly to construct a new version of manhood.

Sommers asks, “How well do [these people] understand and like boys?  Who has authorized their mission?”

David Kupelian is the author of How Evil Works.  He asks, “Why would our culture so denigrate masculinity?  And why — this is the flip side of the same question — are we becoming so increasingly feminized as a society?”  He continues, “Today’s high level of gender confusion and role reversal, manifested most obviously in the dramatic upswing — and near celebration — of homosexuality, is one of the great cultural mysteries of our time.  The bending and sometimes breaking of traditional gender roles permeates our society in obvious and subtle ways.”

Sexual confusion abounds — in clothing, college dorms, and the workplace.   There is sexual confusion when girls “try out” lesbianism or bisexuality because it’s “chic.”   There is sexual confusion when girls wrestle boys and women are put on the front lines of war.

George Gilder is the author of Men and Marriage.  He writes, “To the sexual liberal, gender is a cage.  Behind cruel bars of custom and tradition, men and women for centuries have looked lovingly across forbidden spaces at one another and yearned to be free of sexual roles.”   Hmm.  Reminds me of a beautiful garden where a woman was tempted to reach for something that was not good for her to have.

I’m grateful that  my grandmother took one look at my newly born dad and knew, without a doubt, that she would raise him to be a boy.  More than that, she would allow him to be a boy.  When our sons were born, I didn’t argue with God or tell Him He’d made a mistake.  Nor did I force them to become more soft and sensitive.  There’s no denying that I had to walk a fine line.  They needed to be aware of how girls think and like to be treated, but also be allowed to drive go-carts at high speeds,  climb windmills, blaze a Yellowstone trail, and prefer science fiction to chick flicks and discussions of logic rather than emotion.

I’ll admit there have been (and continue to be) lots of times when I wish my husband better understood me as a woman.  I wish he could “read my mind.”  But, he’s not a woman.  Therefore, we do think, love, perceive, react, and communicate differently.  I’m glad my husband isn’t confused about his gender.  When the enemy is at the door, I will be eternally grateful when he steps in front of me to face evil.  That’s what my brother did one night when a deranged man was breaking in.  My brother did not send my sister-in-law to the door.  He engaged the enemy.  He protected the household.  He knew what his role was and he played it well.

I wonder.  Would Daniel Boone have aggressively tamed the wilderness if his mother had raised him to be “in touch with his feminine side”?  Would husbands and fathers have sacrificed their lives on a ship named Titanic if that culture would have despised chivalry?  And what if young men stayed home and tens upon thousands of young women of child-bearing age stormed the beaches of Normandy, Omaha, and Iwo Jima?

There is nothing wrong with boys.  Just because a boy fidgets doesn’t mean he needs some sort of drug.  There is nothing wrong with boys who want to roughhouse or jump in a muddy stream, but balk at the suggestion of shopping.  Instead of disfiguring distorting, or denying boyishness or girlishness, why don’t we stand in awe of the uniquely different male and female anatomy?  Appreciate the boundaries of male and female gender and grow a healthier, safer society because of them?   Celebrate the male and female eyes of the human race and be better for it?

A war against boys hurts girls, too.  Eventually, it weakens society.  Messing with creation is nasty business with hopeless consequences.

So, that’s why I called the parents of Joel Northrup to say “thank you.”  Joel took a stand as a gentleman and refused to dishonor or confuse a girl on a public wrestling mat.  He is not ashamed to be a boy, to be a male person.  He is  not ashamed to practice his faith which tells him to regard women as the weaker sex, not because they are less than him, but because he is called by God not to take advantage or abuse them.  In putting his faith into practice, Joel honored a created boundary that will serve him — and women — very, very well.