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Archive for July 29th, 2011

There is a reason God’s Word speaks consistently and often about purity.  It is the best way to protect children in a fallen and sinful world.

We must never fool ourselves by saying we are teaching purity in sex education.  The two concepts don’t mix.  Education in sex is what it says it is.  Instruction in purity is quit different.  God never tells parents to educate children about sex, but to raise their sons and daughters in purity.  He equips parents to do this throughout all of Scripture.

You may think I’m quibbling with words.  But, I’m not.  Take the concepts for what they are.  Trace them to their sources.  Discover the original goal and intention of each.  Then follow the trail of consequences.

We all need to do better in protecting our children.  Many loving Christian parents, with their children’s best interests in mind, have inadvertently and most innocently placed their children in harm’s way.  I don’t say that lightly.  I don’t say that as a mom who did everything right by her children.  But, we Christians can’t just point our fingers at non-Christians and say, “Look!  They are bad!  They let children do whatever they want!”  We can’t just look at Planned Parenthood and say, “Shame on them!  They are cruel!  They wiggle their way into public classrooms to abuse our children!”

We Christian moms and dads must try to be honest.  There is another kind of child abuse.  It is done unintentionally by good parents.  It is done without careful analysis, but for supposedly all the right reasons.  Nevertheless, it is cruel.  It is a form of child abuse.  What would you call starting children in sex ed at an early age, adding more information with every year, putting boys and girls together for intimately graphic conversation and details on birth control, explaining that God wants the act of sex to be saved for marriage, but then telling sons and daughters to wait to marry until after getting their degree and settling into a good job?

We don’t have to unintentionally abuse children.  We can intentionally protect them.  And God tells us how.

He wants parents to teach His definition of love.  In 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, God tells what love is: “patient and kind,” and what it isn’t: “arrogant . . . rude, or insistent on its own way.”

Both fathers and mothers can teach sons and daughters to “have nothing to do with silly myths,” but instead “train for godliness.”  (1 Timothy 4:7-10).  We put scholars and athletes through intense training for a purpose.  Similar training is also required for living in a way that pleases God; for running the “race” of life (1 Corinthians 9:24-26).  Parents can contrast “sexual immorality” and “sensuality” with “patience” and “self-control” (Galatians 5:16-24).

Dads or godly mentors can take boys aside to teach them how to respect women.  “Treat older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity” (1 Timothy 5:1-2).  To practice self-control (Titus 2:6).  Big brothers can guard the virginity of their younger sisters and, if she becomes promiscuous, help her stop (Song of Solomon 8:8-9).

Moms or godly mentors can take girls aside to teach them how to respect and help men.  “. . . [L]et your adorning be . . . beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious” (1 Peter 3:4-5).  How to dress, and why… “with what is proper for women who profess godliness” (1 Timothy 2:9-10).  How to “be self-controlled and pure” (Titus 2:4-5).

Then, even though the world may ridicule young people for saying “no” to sex, we can encourage them:  Don’t let anyone “despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity” (1 Timothy 4:11-12).

God also tells us how to welcome our children when they’ve tried, but failed.  We are to welcome our children as He welcomes us.  “Come to Me,” Jesus always says.  Then, He assures us that when “we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

Tomorrow, in Christ, is brimming with hope.

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Why don’t we just admit it.  Child abuse is legal in this country.

We call it sex education.  But, in truth, it is child abuse.  Modern sex education abuses children by stripping them of their innocence.  It sexualizes our children.  Comprehensive sex education incorporates sexuality into language, thinking skills, health, science, and life-style.

Educators and parents (consciously or not) put their trust in a child abuser named Alfred Kinsey.  He is called the father of modern sex education.  Children, he said, are “sexual from birth.”  Few people paid any attention to the fact that Kinsey used known pedaphiles to experiment on children for the purpose of research.  His twisted documentation made its way into textbooks.  Homes.  Churches.  Those who share Kinsey’s disrespect for life and the innocence of children stood ready profit.  To further loosen moral restraints.

Removing the innocence of childhood has created a flourishing market for retailers.  The advertising industry.  Pharmaceutical companies.  Healthcare.  Planned Parenthood.  Who other than this government-subsidized monolith more unashamedly vies for the role of sex educator, pushes all manner of sexual paraphernalia, and then provides abortion services (for a fee, you understand).

I haven’t always used the term “child abuse” to describe sex education.  It was Douglas Gresham, the step-son of C.S. Lewis who helped me see it for what it is.  I had written Gresham to invite him as a speaker for Lutherans For Life.  I happened to mention personal efforts to help my church understand the dangers of sex education.  You are right to do so, he said, because “modern sex education is child abuse.”  Gresham knows what he’s talking about.  He ministers to women who’ve suffered sexual abuse and the loss of life through abortion that often follows years of abuse.  I, too, have heard the painful stories of women who became promiscuous after being exposed to early instruction in sexuality or blatantly sinful abuse.

For years, I traveled here and there speaking to boys, girls, and their parents.  I did not explain the intimacies of sex, but rather the uniqueness of male and female.  This was received as a strange and novel idea.  Maybe not surprising considering that moms and dads had been under the influence of Kinsey, too.  I kept asking: Why would we want to teach our children about all things pertaining to sex before first mentoring them to be boys?  Girls?  On the path to Biblical manhood.  Womanhood.

Churches have failed the youngest generations.  That’s what happens when we are deceived.  Fooled.  The world stands before us, hissing, “Did God really say . . . ?”  We look around to see new trends.  Sophistication.  Contemporary teaching.  Then, we fall into doubt.  We rationalize.  And we play the game.  The world wins when we are distracted from our vocation of instructing children in purity to instead educate them in sex.  So, along with others, I continue to encourage my church to please consider the source of modern sex education.  To refuse to wrap Jesus around worldly opinions and trends.

This mother and grandmother has sensitively-in tune antenna.  I sense, hear, and see that modern sex education is recruitment into sexuality.  Therefore, it is child abuse.

Modern sex education:

  • Is not anatomy class.
  • Fails to guard the innocence of children.
  • Breaks down inhibitions by placing boys and girls together in the same classroom.
  • Instructs children to be “comfortable with their bodies.” (And so they are… with girls having no clue as to why two cups and a thong might attract un-gentlemanly attention.)
  • Tempts children to believe they are, first and foremost, “sexual beings.”

When we believe that we are “sexual beings,” then it only follows that we have the “right” to be “sexual.”  That we “need” to be “sexual.”  And, in today’s culture, no one should deny “my rights.”  No one should deny “my needs.”  Well, here’s the truth that I will continue to proclaim: We are — first and foremost — human beings, made in the image of God and, although fallen from that image, we are called to holy living as a man or a woman.  Equal, but different.  Can you imagine how that changes the way we see ourselves and others?  The choices we make?  The way we treat one another?

The media and the general public is angry when a priest sexually abuses a child.  We should be.  But, where is our righteous anger when children fall under the tutorage of Planned Parenthood?   SIECUS?  LGBT and GLSEN-approved textbooks?  Projects such as “It Gets Better,” the “bullying” program initiated by homosexual advocate and leading “sex-advice” columnist Dan Savage?  (Warning: All of these sites are graphic.)

Children are not on this earth for our use.  They are gifts from God.  They are treasures of Jesus Christ.  I stand on this truth as a woman.  A mother.  A grandmother.  Try to prove me wrong.  Take your case before the Creator.  Question your reasons for defending sex education and the source of your information.

Educating children in sex is cruel.  It is a far cry from a parent’s role to instruct sons and daughters in purity.  Remembering our own mistakes, we may fear for our children, but comprehensive sex education does not protect young hearts, minds and souls.  Instruction in purity does.  It allows us to protect our children in ways we, perhaps, were not.

What can a parent do?  For starters, teach boys what it means to be a man.  Girls what it means to be a woman.  There are only two sexes, equal but different.  Teach respect for both.  Resist falling for the lie that “experts” know better how to raise your children.  Help children and teens set goals.  Discuss the consequences of choices. Remind them that their bodies are not their own to do with as they please, but creations of God and valued at high price (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

There is a time for everything.  Childhood is a time for innocence.  Therefore, keep the fence up and the gate closed.

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