Some say, “How could a woman end the life of her child?” This statement is not intended to be cruel, but it is heard as a judgment.
Others, hoping to be less judgmental, say, “I would never have have an abortion myself, but I believe every woman should have the right to choose.” This statement sounds compassionate, but to the woman who has had the abortion, it sounds like a comparison: “Abortion is wrong and because I am a good person I wouldn’t do such a terrible thing, but women not capable of doing the right thing should have a choice.”
Both statements are condeming. Neither offer hope before or after an abortion.
There is a third response. Trying to imitate Jesus. Jesus understands why people like you and me sin. He came to live among us — to feel our frustration, fears, and sorrow. He placed Himself in the midst of a messy world. Jesus loved us so much that He willingly took on our disgrace, our burden, our sin. Only by living under His Cross am I able to see those hurt by sin (including my own) in a new way.
Days on which we celebrate life are meant to be happy days, but for many they are not. In the heart of nearly every post-abortive woman is an empty place that is forever expectant and waitiing. Although she may have believed the lie that there was no room, a cry of sorrow echoes in the room that was always there… waiting.
We cannot go back to erase years of legalized abortion nor the effect on women, men, children, and society. Mothers who once believed there was no room in their life for a baby now mourn the child whose heart beat so close under their own. Fathers who once believed there was no room in their life for a baby are now angry at themselves for failing to protect their son or daugher. Grandparents who once believed there was no room in their lives for a baby now dream of grandchildren that would have filled the rooms of their homes with laughter.
Sometimes, when I am holding my grandsons, my thoughts turn to Mary. She approached me after I was finished speaking to a group of women. She asked for my address and phone number. In the letters and conversations that followed, she confessed two abortions. “There has been so much pain in my heart,” Mary wrote. “I could understand how God could forgive a murderer, but not someone who has killed their own child.”
This pain and the belief that she had committed the sin “too big to be forgiven” held Mary captive. But, “the reason I want to tell you my story,” Mary continued, “is to thank you. If, years earlier, I had heard the words of compassion and forgiveness that I heard from you, I would not have had a second abortion. I would have been reconciled to God and turned my life around a lot earlier instead of wallowing in the muck of sin and accusation.”
“Marys” are everywhere… and they are waiting. They are silently waiting for a word of hope. Their broken hearts long to be healed. God has given to me — to you — His Word to speak in love. To be sure, the Word of Truth presses hard on the source of pain. The psalmist (Psalm 32:3-5) writes:
When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was dried up as by the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to You, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,’ and You forgave the iniquity of my sin.”
There is hope for women and men who have been pierced by abortion’s blade. It is Jesus. In Jesus, all who confess their sin are cleansed and forgiven (1 Timothy 1:15). In Jesus, the captive is set free (Galatians 5:1).
(The thoughts of this post are available in a
brochure form upon request from Word of Hope or LFL.)