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Archive for the ‘Life issues’ Category

I believe we have a problem in our culture because we have been deceived.  We have believed the lie about our identity.

Labeling ourselves — first and foremost — “sexual beings,” we have, indeed, given ourselves license to live a sensual and highly sexualized life.

This impacts how we see ourselves and others.  It impacts our choices.  It is, so we’ve been led to believe, who we are.

But, why does this concern me?  Why do I almost seem obsessed with this single topic?

Because it very well may affect what happens to me as I grow older and near the end of my life.

You see, my generation of baby boomers is 76 million strong.  But, my son’s generation is only 17 million.  Now, let’s consider the state of the economy.  Health care. Legalized abortion in all U.S. states for any reason at any time before (and even after) birth.  Legalized euthanasia in some states.

If I am what I’m told I am — a “sexual being” — then what happens when I’m not thinking, looking, or acting so sexual?  What happens when that isn’t the driving force of my life?  What happens when this not-so-sexual-anymore woman doesn’t attract a man’s attention?  Develops fine lines and wrinkles?  Slows her pace?  Appears less productive, but more costly?  Requires more patience and care from others?

My identity matters.  So does yours.  I am not — first and foremost — a sexual being.

I am far more than that.  I am God’s own possession.  Of such great value that Christ gave His life for me.  I am the daughter of the King.  A treasure of great worth.  A vessel for honorable use.  A woman alive to proclaim the excellencies of Him who called me (1 Peter 2:9).

Don’t label me a “sexual being.”  I am more than that.

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My daughter-in-law, Alison, made an observation today that should give us all pause.

In this country, the rights of a criminal or terrorist are more valued than the rights of an unborn son or daughter.

What should we do about that?

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Americans are waking up to the fact that we have sexualized our children.  They are appalled by the sensual dress of girls starting at early ages. They are worried about boys’ early addictions to pornography and that pedophiles lurk around many a dark corner.

I’m convinced, after 30 years of careful study, that sex talk and instruction has made boys and girls less safe.  More vulnerable.  The “sex talk” and images of TV, movies, and the internet threaten the physical, emotional, and spiritual wellness of the youngest generations.

But, how many of us are willing to admit that we’re part of the problem?  That we may have unintentionally broken down the wall of innocence to leave boys and girls more vulnerable to the pull of the world and their own human flesh?

Do you think that years of sex education, even for the best of intentions, could have anything to do with the sexualization of children?  Do you think that sex talk can raise curiosity?  Tantilize?  Stir up images?  Create a comfortableness with their fickle heart and deceptive flesh?

Let’s think about what happens in the sex ed classroom.  Boys and girls are rarely taught separately.  Beginning at a young age, these boys and girls are subjected to sex talk.  This sex talk is necessary, or so some say, because we are “sexual from birth.”

But, who said we are “sexual from birth?”  Well, o.k., maybe it wasn’t God, but we are “sexual beings,” aren’t we?  Don’t our children need to hear the “right” kind of sex talk?  Sexually educated (the “right” way), won’t they be better protected from teen pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases (STDs)?

What is the “right” way?  Is it the way we perceive it?  Educating the way we thought we should (including 30+ years of Christian sex education), do we have more or less teen pregnancy?  STDs?  Teen depression?  Abortion?  Cohabitation? Single parents?

Some people don’t like it when I refer to sex education as a form of child abuse.

Last year, an article of mine entitled “Child Abuse” was published.  The purpose was to help the Christian community recognize that we’ve let unbelieving neighbors in the land influence our teachings.  We have adapted worldly techniques and then attempted to wrap Jesus around them.  (He can’t and won’t.)  The article angered a Christian sex educator.  That anger, observed my husband, motivated me to bring order to some random notes and research.  If you will allow me to say so, I believe the Spirit was whispering: It is time.  Gather your years of experience and observations together into a helpful resource.

That resource is, for now, entitled Faithfulness: One Child at a Time.  It is a collection of questions and answers on sex education versus instruction in purity for Christian dialogue.  I’ve been encouraged by honest “editors.”  Perhaps it will soon become clear what should be done with it.

Last week, Todd Wilken and Jeff Schwartz invited me to discuss parts of the booklet on Issues, Etc.  You can find that interview here (see July 17).  Better than the interview is the PDF format which Issues, Etc. included for anyone who wants to explore some reasons for a dangerously sexualized culture.  Getting to the root of the problem, we are better able to provide a different kind of instruction.  A different kind of mentoring.  Speaking of mentoring, you may also find the document at Titus 2 for Life.

Over the next few days, I hope to post some excerpts from Faithfulness: One Child at a Time.  I’ll begin with the reasons why sex education – in or out of the church – might very accurately be labeled sex abuse.  Both Scripture and science concur.

Oh.  And there’s this to remember.  Perhaps we’ve been an advocate of sex education because we were deceived.  Fearing for our children, we may have put our trust in a particular theory or so-called expert.  Wrong thinking can be left in the past.  Truly sorry for ways we may have unintentionally brought harm, we are reconciled to God in Christ.  His Word gives us all we need to do battle with the world for the sake of our sons and daughters.

We engage in that battle by being distinctively different from the world.  Are you up for the challenge?

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My left-leaning “sisters” claim there is a “war on women.”  They’re right about the war, but they’re confused about who is waging it and why.

John Stonestreet, writing for Breakpoint, quotes from The Screwtape Letters.  (It is, I believe, my most favored work of C.S. Lewis.) “In an especially prophetic chapter,” notes Stonestreet, “Uncle Screwtape explains to his demon nephew Hell’s strategy for using imagery to derail human sexuality: ‘We have engineered a great increase in . . . the apparent nude (not the real nude) . . . It is all a fake, of course; the figures in the popular art are falsely drawn; the real women in bathing suits or tights are actually pinched in and propped up to make them appear firmer and more slender than nature allows a full-grown woman to be.  As a result we are more and more directing the desires of men to something which does not exist.’  If there’s a more perfect summary of how our culture views women,” writes Stonestreet, “I haven’t found it.”

Our culture’s perspective on women opposes God’s.  I sometimes trip over myself in the excitement of sharing the truth: We are creations of the holy God… real women in all sizes, shapes, and colors.

Often, I quote from the book What A Young Woman Ought to Know written by Mary Wood-Allen, M.D.  I found it in my grandmother’s collection.   Dr. Allen, a physician in the late 1800s and early 1900s, wrote, “The reason we admire the tapering waist is because we have been wrongly educated.  We have acquired wrong ideas of beauty.  We have accepted the ideals of the fashion-plate rather than those of the Creator.”  Then, she detailed the corset, a hideous contraption worn by women — pre or post pregnancy — who coveted a 17 inch waist.

The corset shaped a woman’s body so that a man would be attracted.  But, at what price?   Dr. Allen wrote that Hiram Powers, a great sculptor, once attended an elegant party where he was observed watching a beautifully dressed and fashionable woman.  A friend noticed, and said to Powers, “What an elegant figure she has!”  “Well,” said Powers, “I was wondering where she put her liver.”  As a sculptor, Powers had studied the human body.  He knew that some internal organs, stomach included, had to be displaced in order to create that tapering waist.

A corseted waist made breathing so difficult it was not unusual for a woman to faint.   Yet, it was viewed by the culture as a way to increase beauty.  False beauty.

The corset.  How barbarous!  Now, think our culture.  Bulimia.  Anorexia.  Piercings.  Tats.  Cosmetic surgeries.  Girls pinched in, propped up, and covered only by fig leaves.  All of this is addictive.  All of this is false.

Focusing on sexuality, we mis-shape the image our youngest women have of themselves.  We deceive them into becoming “fake” women.

Only later in life did I realize that my Barbie doll, if a real woman, wouldn’t be able to stand.  Top heavy and with pencil-thin waist, she would fall face down.  How embarrassing.  More than that, what a sad and dangerous mistaken identity.

For many years, I’ve listened to women tell me about the sorrows and false hope of their abortion experience.  There is an identity issue long before the choice of abortion.   These women have helped me understand what happens when we see ourselves from the world’s perspective rather than God’s.

Wrongly educated and believing the lie, men and women are stripped of true identity.

More than sexual beings, we are human beings – male or female – with the attributes of our Creator.  We are each His special possession designed for the purpose of living a life that reflects those attributes.  We are more than bodies, but heads to think and souls that never die.

There is something wrong and potentially dangerous about being defined as a “sexual being.”  Yes, we have sexual thoughts and desires.  But, what if we never marry?  Are we less of a person?  No!  And, if we do marry, but our bodies don’t function as we think they should, are we “junk?”  No!

It is most certainly true that we procreate sexually, but again, what happens if we never marry or can’t have biological children of our own?  Are we mis-fits?  No!  Jesus tells us that there is no marriage in heaven.  Oh my!  Then, do we become floating, bodiless souls?  Angels?  No!  And no!  We maintain our identity as God’s magnificent and beautiful creation.  Our identity as His priceless possessions never changes.  From the moment God thought of us right through eternity.  Can this change the way we see ourselves?  Yes.  The choices we make?  Yes. The life we live?  Oh, yes.

Never once does God tell us to stop being a male or female, but He does tell us to guard against sensuality.  To not let sexual thoughts and desires determine every behavior.  God designed male and female to fit perfectly together in marriage, but He said: Have no other gods before Me.  Might it be that obsession on sexuality is putting something else before God?

There is a “war on women.”  (Therefore, on men, too.)  Dear parents!  Which of us wants to put a daughter at risk?  To sexualize her… and tantalize boys and men?  To distort both male and female ideas of what real women are actually like?  To deceive all the way to the pharmacy… the abortion clinic… or where after that?

Resources for you to consider:
Dressing for Life: Secrets of the Great Cover-up
(a ten-lesson Bible study for girls) (Available here)
Titus 2 for Life, a mentoring ministry

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Brad Pitt is about to become the husband of Angelina Jolie.  Angelina Jolie is the daughter Jon Voight.  As we all know, Brad, Angelina, and Jon are well-known celebrities in Hollywood.

Academy-award winner Voight is more than just Angelina Jolie’s dad, he is a seasoned conservative voice in Hollywood.  So, when Brad Pitt’s mother spoke out against President Obama’s stance on gay “marriage” and abortion, Voight told FOX News that he agrees with his daughter’s soon-to-be mother-in-law.  “Good for her,” he said, for expressing those views.

Mrs. Pitt shared her perspective in a letter-to-the editor of her local paper, Missouri’s Springfield News-Leader.  She described the President as a “liberal who supports the killing of unborn babies and same-sex marriage.”  She said that fellow Christians should give “prayerful consideration” to supporting the presumptive GOP nominee whose morals, she said, contrast those of President Obama.  Quickly, Mrs. Pitt was labeled a  homophobe — all across Twitter-land.

Brad Pitt’s brother, Doug, came to his mother’s defense.  “There can be healthy discussions when people disagree with you.  The bad thing is when it turns to venom and negativity, and we don’t have that in our family.  It’s open discussion.  We can learn from each other . . ..”

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Mr. President, isn’t it your duty to do all you do in the best interests of the future of this country?  Aren’t children the greatest natural resource this country has?

Pentagon officials, isn’t it your duty to guard the citizens of this country from those who would bring harm to us?

School administrators, isn’t it your duty to respect the role of parents and instruct their children in ways that will build a vibrant and thriving society?

Then, why o why, do you celebrate gay pride?

There can be no pride in any behavior that endangers health, marriage, home and family, the nation’s security, or the lives of children — America’s greatest natural resource.

There can be no pride in immoral gay behavior any more than there can be pride in immoral heterosexual behavior.

In what way does “it’s my right,” “I’ll do as I please,” “I just have to be who I am” behavior help develop sound character in children?

Are those who insist on teaching “tolerance” for homosexual – or heterosexual – behavior to children K-12 interested in guarding the innocence and well-being of this nation’s sons and daughters?  Or are they more interested in some other agenda?

Mr. President, you have celebrated “gay pride.”  You see it as an expression of diversity.  At what price?

Pentagon officials, you have celebrated “gay pride.”  You see it as, well, I’m not sure how you see it.  I don’t know how messing around with issues of “sexuality” makes for a stronger national defense.

School officials, you have opened the door to ideologies and agendas that have nothing to do with nurturing stronger minds, healthier bodies, and hopeful futures.

It isn’t too late to apologize… and do better for the sake of the children.

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In Bible class, we’ve been studying history as revealed through Genesis.  Last Sunday, we considered the angel’s visit to Sodom and Gommorah.  They came to rescue Lot, the nephew of Abraham, before destroying the cities.  Why were these cities marked for destruction?  “Because the outcry against Sodom and Gommorah is great and their sin is very grave” (Genesis 19:20).  How grave was their sin?  Let me quote from verses 4-5: “. . . [T]he men of the city, both young and old, all the people to the last man, surrounded the house.  And they called to Lot, ‘Where are the men who came to you tonight?  Bring them out to us, that we may know them.”  Know them?  Yes, like Adam “knew” or was “one with” his wife.  Except, in the case of all these men, there could never be a natural and “good fit.”

Lot, the husband and father of the one apparent believing family in Sodom, was so desperate to prevent the sin of sodomy upon his guests — God’s own angels — that he offered his daughters to the begging men.  For those who think this one through, I don’t need to say anymore.

It is a fact that archeologists and geologists have discovered the charred remains of Sodom and the surrounding cities.  I’ll leave it to you to believe — or doubt — that God really did destroy the cities.  I choose to take the author of Scripture at His word.  “Then the Lord rained on Sodom and Gomorrah sulfur and fire from the Lord out of heaven” (Genesis 19:24).  When Lot gathered up his wife and daughters, his sons-in-laws thought he was jesting.  They didn’t take his warning seriously.  Martin Luther observed, “The nearer the world is to destruction, the smugger it is.”

Have we grown smug?  I think so.  Unbelievers completely disregard the reality of Sodom and its particular evil.  Christians who have been deceived by the world and their own weak flesh observe that what happened at Sodom was the lack of hospitality.  But, as a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ, I trust that Sodom was destroyed because the True God cannot remain patient with the distortion of His creation — or the idol worship of ourselves — forever.

With Sodom in mind, I am going to do something I would prefer not doing.  Lest anyone think we have not fallen to the state of that historic city of Sodom, you might want to view for yourself the photos of the recent gay pride parade and festival in Philadelphia.  If you can bear it, take note of the involvement of children.

Truly, I am saddened, no, sickened to have to draw anyone’s attention to these photos.  But, our eyes must be open.  We must warn against anything that separates people from God.  We cannot simply turn our backs on each other.

Those who boast in their “gay pride” are real people.  Many of them are hurting people with stories that would break our hearts.  Some of them have been abused.  Some are confused.  And, yes, some have willingly chosen to mock their Creator.  As caring people who are called to follow Christ, we must see what is happening.  Such perversion of creation does not glorify God.  It cannot build a generation of hope.  We are needed to speak truth.  To stand against evil.  To love the repentant neighbor caught in sin. To gently lead out of sin to a new life in Christ.

So, view the following. Then decide where you will take your stand.  Will it be on His Word… or the word of the deceiver?

http://americansfortruth.com/2012/06/21/philadelphia-gay-pride-parade-and-festival-feature-lewd-acts-porn-booth-sadomasochists/#more-11937

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“It’s hard to imagine two stranger organizational bedfellows,” writes Marvin Olasky, Editor in Chief of WORLD magazine (WORLD exclusive, July 14, 2012).  Olasky is referring to the partnership between the National Association of Evangelicals (NAE) and the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy.  The partnership is not only “strange” but unnatural because it attempts to blend two opposing worldviews.

Founded in 1942, the NAE is a pro-life, Christian organization of more than 40 denominations whose motto is: “Cooperation Without Compromise.”  The Campaign, founded in 1996, is a secular organization devoted to promoting contraceptive use by the unmarried.  “The National Campaign is zealous,” writes Olasky.  “When conservatives this year tried to reduce funding for Planned Parenthood and similar groups, the lead story on the Campaign’s newsletter began, ‘The U.S. House of Representatives recently voted to increase teen and unplanned pregnancy.’”

Before Olasky’s article entitled “Strange Bedfellows” was published, I was aware that he was investigating a multi-year $1 million grant given by the Campaign to the NAE in 2008.  The Campaign itself, notes Olasky, has received grants from abortion advocates and contraception pushers.  For more details, I encourage you to read Olasky’s articles in WORLD (7-14-12, pp. 9-11, 88).

So, what’s going on here?  Why would pro-life Christians accept help from people who seek to promote contraceptive use by unmarried people?  Who advocate abortion?  I think it is because Christians have been deceived.  We have been deceived by one question: “Did God really say . . . ?”  (Do you hear that hissing sound?)  Did God really say that male and female are set apart for holy purpose?  That sex is not just something two people are going to participate in – married or not – because they can’t help it?

Once deceived, we believe the lie.  What is the lie?  That we are “sexual from birth.”

Olasky’s article exposes a problem.  Something goes awry whenever Christians accept help from those with an opposing worldview.  We become “strange bedfellows” with non-believing neighbors in the land whenever we “evolve” away from God’s Word.  In this case, the NAE is doing the very thing it says it will not do.  It is compromising Biblical faith in the area of sexuality, I think, for two reasons.

It appears that the NAE has determined for itself what is right and wrong.  It has aligned itself with false teachers.  When approached in the Garden by the serpent, a flattered Eve not only spoke for God, she added words of her own to His.  Putting ourselves in God’s place is dangerous.

Secondly, it appears that the NAE, having been deceived, now thinks itself wise.  Wisdom, however, does not come from the world, but through fear of God.  False wisdom believes the lie that we are “sexual from birth.”   Clinging to such “wisdom,” sexual promiscuity – with all of its consequences – increases.  Since we can’t help being the “sexual” beings we are, we’ll just have to rely on the corner drug store.  Deception leads us to rationalize.  Tempted to think that unmarried people will naturally exercise their sexuality, Christians are deceived into justifying provision for the “lesser of two evils.”  NAE President Leith Anderson responded to Olasky, saying, “The Church is understandably reluctant to recommend contraception for unmarried sexual partners, given that it cannot condone extramarital sex.  However, it is even more tragic when unmarried individuals compound one sin by conceiving and then destroying the precious gift of life.”  Many of us may agree with Anderson.

Are we trapped between a rock and a hard place?  What can we do?  I propose that we stop listening to false teachers.  We are not, first and foremost, sexual beings.  We are human beings called to live out our lives as male or female.  Although fallen from God’s perfect image, we are still created with His attributes, not the attributes of animals.  This is what our children need to hear.

The Christian community will better serve a modern culture by remembering how revolutionary we really are.  “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth” by His will, not through sexual behavior.  This was a radical worldview for all the neighbors of the Israelites.  This is still a radical worldview in today’s society.  Historically, the Judeo-Christian view of human life, marriage, and procreative sex was a revolutionary idea that de-sexualized God and religion.  “I Am” stood in contrast to “gods” who engaged in sex with other gods and humans.  Judeo-Christianity introduced the concept of holiness.  It contrasted a life of purity with a life captive to sensuality.   It sanctified the procreative act of sex and connected men to wives, home and generational faithfulness.  “The sexual genie,” writes Dennis Prager, “was forced into the marital bottle.”

God’s own people have always been given opportunity to affect the culture.  But, considering ourselves wiser than God, we become foolish.  Foolish into captivity.  The Israelites were captive in Babylon for so long that generations forgot the Truth and became comfortable with their environment.  When the Israelites were told they could return to their homeland where they could rebuild Jerusalem, very few wanted to go back to “old ways.”  I fear we, too, have grown comfortable with our environment.  Deceived, we believe the lie… and cling to wrong identity

How many times have we told that we are “sexual” beings?  When does God define us that way?   He doesn’t.  Instead, God sets us apart as a people all His own.  We struggle with the “old man” in us, but our Baptism in Christ makes us new every morning. We are not bound by passions of ignorance, but called to reflect our Creator.  God is holy (not sexy) (1 Peter 1:14-16).  We are “His own possession” equipped to “proclaim the excellencies of Him who called you” (1 Peter 2:9).  We are strengthened to “abstain from the passions of the flesh which wage war against our souls” here on earth (2:11).  God warns us away from sensuality, but never does God tell His people to stop living their lives as male and female.

We want to make abortion unthinkable.  But, abortion – and new definitions of marriage and family — will always be thinkable for people who see themselves as “sexual from birth.”  Such deception brings us dangerously close to idolatry.  Exchanging the Truth for a lie, we worship the creature rather than the Creator.  At that moment, we are vulnerable to Satan, the world, and our own sensual flesh.

Sex does not have to dominate society.  God-ordained institutions of marriage and family can build a vibrant civilization.  The innocence of children can be guarded.  Men and women can complement one another.  It begins with fear of God rather than trust in fickle hearts and weak flesh.  Even in marriage, husbands and wives are called to more than a sexual relationship, but a partnership as good stewards over all that God has entrusted to them and a life that anticipates Jesus’ return.  Anticipating Jesus, men and women – married or not — do best to see themselves as God sees them.  To be distinctively different from the world.  To be vessels for honorable use.

Our purpose in this world flows from our identity as God’s holy people.  So, let us avoid “strange bedfellows” and affect the culture with true wisdom (1 Corinthians 2:5).

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Am I really a “victim of circumstances?”  Is it helpful to blame others for what might be wrong in my life?  Is it helpful to excuse my failures and faults by viewing them as “inherited traits”?  Am I a slave to wrong behavior?

No.

I look to the Law for my warning.  The Law of God’s Word explains my sinful condition.  It warns me away from wrong choices and behavior.  Then, when I feel overwhelmed and discouraged by my wrong choices, I look to the Gospel.  I see that change is possible in Christ.  I discover that the Holy Spirit enables me to modify my own character, tendencies and habits so that I can pass on to my children and grandchildren something better.  I take hope in the fact that doing good things — the things that please God — is transmissible.

It is easy to excuse my poor behavior by claiming that I’ve inherited a “bad” trait.  But, this is to say: I am a slave.  I have no opportunity to acquire freedom.  This is just who I am.

This is what Satan and the world would have me believe.  But, I don’t buy it.

It is true that under the Law of God I am chained to hopelessness because of my rebellious and sinful condition.  But, under the Gospel, my chains are broken.  I am set free in Jesus Christ to live differently.  To resist evil and do good.   To learn from mistakes and not repeat them.  To perhaps fail again but then, in Christ, start new every morning.

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I’ve recently returned from leading another Titus 2 Retreat.  As always, the women are free to make comments on an evaluation sheet after the last session.  Here’s one that I received:

“You helped me think of abortion in a different way when you said it is a symptom of what is wrong.  While abortion is wrong, we need to protect our girls so it does not get to that point.  I thought that was enlightening.”

Enlightening?

Could it be that this faithful Lutheran woman had never thought about the behaviors that must first be chosen before a girl finds herself in a place where she even considers an abortion?  Did her church never explain this?  Did her church call abortion “wrong” and warn “don’t do it,” but fail to dig to the root of abortion and why too many people cling to it as some sort of “salvation?” Was she perhaps in agreement that children should be “more comfortable with their sexuality,” but then surprised when as many Christian as non-Christian girls seek abortions?

It seems so.  And, for that reason, Titus 2 will continue — for life.  It is in the best interests of boys and girls to be mentored in Biblical manhood and womanhood — before they learn about the procreative act of sex.  Their lives — and those of the preborn — are worth it.

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