Let’s continue with opportunity #3 —
#3 — MENTOR BIBLICAL WOMANHOOD
A woman who fears the Lord is to be praised (Proverbs 31:30b).
Fear and Love the Lord. Martin Luther begins each of the meanings for the Ten Commandments with: “We should fear and love God . . . .” In a sinful world, “fear” and “love” hardly seem to fit together. But the Heavenly Father can be both feared (for His justice) and loved (for His mercy). How does this give freedom to modern women?
Reject the Deception of the World. The Christian woman is often reminded of the Proverbs 31 woman. But do we know why she was praised? Church Father St. Bernard of Clairvaux draws us away from the idea that this woman was praised for her spectacular work. He wrote, “You have been able to reject the deceitful glory of the world . . . you deserve to be praised for not being deceived.” (The Lutheran Study Bible ESV, Commentary on Proverbs 31:30-31, page 1047.) How was the first woman, Eve, deceived? Why did Satan approach her rather than the man? What is the deceitful glory of the world? How do we resist it? How do we help others resist it?
Discern Personal Mentors. Whose counsel and advice do we seek? Do we surround ourselves with women in the same situation and circumstance as our own or do we glean wisdom from “older” women who have matured in the face of challenge? What kind of reading material is on our coffee table or by our bedside? Have we been influenced by human opinions and fickle emotion… or the Word of the Lord who calls Himself “the Alpha and Omega”?
Resist the Temptation to Divide Generations. Bring older and younger women together in Titus 2-style groups. Suggested resources include Titus 2 for Life, Dressing for Life: Secrets of the Great Cover-up (a ten-lesson reproducible Bible study on modesty and clothing available from CPH [#LFLDFL]), Men, Women and Relationships: Building a Culture of Life Across Generations (a 12-lesson Bible study with leader’s guide from CPH [#LFL901BS]), The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, Girl Talk: Mother-Daughter Conversations on Biblical Womanhood by Carolyn Mahaney and Nicole Mahaney Whitacre, and Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. We can encourage and be encouraged by building relationships across generations.
Take Care Not to Burn Bridges. Sometimes, the relationship of two women can suffer because of a difference in thought or behavior. Even so, the Holy Spirit may keep that person close to the heart. Perhaps we will be nudged to send a simple “thinking of you” card or a gift on her birthday. We do well in not resisting opportunities to reach out. For example, years after a Christian woman had an abortion followed by a divorce, she wrote her friend, “Thank you for keeping the communication open and not burning any bridges. You have not abandoned me.” That friendship was restored in greater measure. How do such invaluable lessons encourage others?
Send a card. This may be the age of e-mail, texting and Facebook, but none of these replace a personal phone call, handwritten note or card. We all like to be remembered, don’t we? It is not uncommon to send a card and then have the recipient, sometime later, ask, “How did you know that I needed encouragement that day?” If we can’t find the right message or can’t afford a pricey card, we can write a favorite Bible passage on a note and tuck it in an envelope with a tea bag or pre-packaged coffee pouch.
Start a Mother’s Group. Include “older” and “younger” moms. In a mobile society, young moms are often miles away from their mothers and grandmothers. They are in need of older women who can mentor self-control, purity, homemaking, kindness, and why submission to husbands is obedience to God (Titus 2:5). Offer opportunity to learn from faithful biblical practice in the home, but also mistakes made and lessons learned. Experienced moms can point to the discipline of God’s Law and offer the forgiveness and life-changing hope of the Gospel. Even in a changed culture, God’s Word for women provides all we need to persevere in the vocation of motherhood. Can you count the ways that godly motherhood influences children and impacts society?
What’s Next? #4: Mentor a Changed Attitude
Ezer’s Handbook is a resource developed by
Linda Bartlett and presented at Titus 2 Retreats
Ezerwoman's Blog 
The Hopelessness of Separating Procreation from Sex
Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Citizenship, Commentaries of others, Culture Shifts, Life issues, Relationships, tagged childless, extinction, family, future, humanity, Japan, love, marriage, procreation, relationships, sex, trends on October 28, 2013| 1 Comment »
Eric Metaxas from Breakpoint (10/28) brings something to Ezerwoman’s attention. Having been concerned about the separation of procreation from sex here in the American culture, I find the following worthy of our attention. Eric Metaxas writes:
Long-time BreakPoint listeners know about Japan’s catastrophically-low birthrates: by 2060, Japan’s population is projected to fall by a third, the same percentage killed by the Black Death in 14th-century Europe.
Japan’s demographic decline has spawned some creepy adaptations, such as lifelike talking dolls for elderly Japanese without grandchildren, or the borrowing of other people’s grandchildren for a day.
Attempts to encourage child-bearing through economic incentives have failed, as they have in other countries with low birth-rates. Younger Japanese aren’t interested in reproducing themselves.
And now, according to a recent article in the UK’s Guardian, they’re increasingly uninterested in sex, as well.
A 2011 survey found that 61 percent of unmarried men and 49 percent of unmarried women between 18 and 34 were not involved in any kind of relationship. Another survey found that a third of those under thirty had never dated.
As the Guardian puts it, “Japan’s under-40s won’t go forth and multiply out of duty, as postwar generations did.” Why? Part of the reason has to do with Japanese attitudes to women in the workforce. As one 32-year-old woman told the paper, “a woman’s chances of promotion in Japan stop dead as soon as she marries.” The assumption is that she’ll become pregnant and have to resign.
While that helps to explain why her generation isn’t having children or even getting married, it doesn’t explain the lack of interest in sex. And it certainly doesn’t explain why an increasing number of Japanese men aren’t interested in it either.
One 31-year-old man spoke for many of his peers when he said, “I find some of my female friends attractive but I’ve learned to live without sex. Emotional entanglements are too complicated . . . I can’t be bothered.”
“Can’t be bothered.” Or mendokusai in Japanese. (Didn’t think I could speak Japanese, did you? Well, I can’t.)
Most of the other possible factors the Guardian cites, including “the lack of a religious authority that ordains marriage and family,” are only partial explanations. Japan’s “precarious earthquake-prone ecology that engenders feelings of futility, and the high cost of living and raising children” don’t explain the increasing lack of interest in sex. But here’s something that does: it’s the lack of interest in having children. The assumption of the sexual revolution was that, having severed the link between sex and procreation, the result would be “better sex.”
Since the “urban pastimes” available to younger Japanese provide pleasure without the entanglements, sex can seem like a bad investment of time and energy. Mendokusai.
The Guardian calls Japan’s separation of love and sex “pragmatic.” But the evidence strongly suggests that there is nothing “pragmatic”—as in “dealing with things sensibly and realistically”—about that separation. We human beings simply aren’t wired that way.
In some important respects, the difference between Japan and us is one of degree, not kind. It remains to be seen if a generation of young Americans will one day replace “whatever” with “mendokusai.”
Read Full Post »