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Archive for the ‘Biblical manhood & womanhood’ Category

Remembering Heroes

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Citizenship, Faith & Practice, Vocation, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 11, 2010| Leave a Comment »

This morning, I stood at the Iowa Falls Veteran’s Memorial under a brilliant blue sky and surprisingly warm November sun.  It was the right place to be on this Veteran’s Day.  It was where my uncles would want me to be.   I owe them so very much.

My uncles are heroes.  Five of their names are inscribed upon the WWII Memorial wall.  Uncles Wayne, Oswald and Ronald have died.  But, Uncles Victor and Kenneth still live to remind me of a great sacrifice.  One that I’ll never be able to repay by anything other than my promise to live on as a grateful and involved citizen.

The debt I owe my uncles is surely difficult to comprehend.  But, I know this for certain.  We are a safer people who can worship, work, live out dreams, raise families, and build a future because of the price paid by Americans soldiers — in the past or present.

When the members of our local American Legion fired their rifles in tribute, many things came to mind.  My grandsons aren’t old enough to understand what patriotism really is, but I want to be able to tell them.  America isn’t a perfect a country, but she is a free country thanks to immeasurable human sacrifice.  That human sacrifice even allows those of liberal, global, and non-Christian persuasion to voice their opinions, practice their vocations, and choose their lifestyle.   Sometimes, when I’m on a road trip and cross state lines, I’m physically reminded of the freedom I have to come and go as I please.

My uncles and all the others who willingly step forward in battle against evil do so because they are compelled to protect women and children.  They are compelled to stand against fascism, socialism, communism, and terrorism.  They are compelled to protect the freedoms of American citizens who go about their daily tasks on the home front.  What is this compelling force?  What instinctively beckons them to defend home and family?  I believe it is the Creator of human life, God Himself, who calls and equips men to fight the battle for life.  That battle may be against an enemy on foreign soil, but it may also be against the evils of everyday life on domestic soil.

Men of faithfulness are needed on all battlefronts.  Just as they are needed to fight against evil ideas of men like Hitler and Hussein, they are also needed to fight closer to home against ideas, policies, and choices that threaten marriage, home, and children.

We may say my uncles were men from the “greatest generation,” but there is no generation of men (or women) greater than another.  Every generation has its faults because we are all tainted by sinful pride and selfishness.  In spite of human failures, however, thousands and thousands of men serve as examples of humble, yet strong and faithful manhood so that sons, grandsons, and nephews can do the same.

If you’re looking for a “teachable moment” for your sons and grandsons, order “The League of Grateful Sons,” an inspiring film shot on location in Iwo Jima.  Watch and listen as veterans who fought there re-tell the story to a younger generation.  You may order this DVD from Vision Forum.

Then, thank God for your grandfather, dad, uncles, or brothers who stepped forward to protect and defend home and hearth.  It appears I am leaving out the women who serve their country; but, I’m not.  I’m grateful to them, too, although I hold fast to the Biblical teaching that women are not called into combat.  Discussions with women in the military prove that there are ways for women to serve the country they love without being placed in the direct line of enemy fire.

Thank you, my uncles.  Thank you for being my heroes.  Thank you for enabling me to live my days in a democratic republic, celebrate freedom, and practice Biblical faith.  In the words of General Dwight D. Eisenhower,

The purpose of a devout and united people was set forth in the pages of the Bible… 1) to live in freedom, 2) to work in a prosperous land . . . and 3) to obey the commandments of God . . . This Biblical story of the Promised Land inspired the founders of America.  It continues to inspire . . .

me.

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The Heart of Her Husband Trusts in Her

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Identity, Relationships, Vocation, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 6, 2010| 1 Comment »

An excellent wife who can find?  She is far more precious than jewels.  The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.  She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life (Proverbs 31:10-11)

The Proverbs 31 woman seems to receive lots of praise from both men and women.  But, perhaps the praise is for something different than we think.

The first woman, Eve, fell into sin when she failed to trust God, doubted His Word, and determined for herself what was right and wrong.  This is not the case with the Proverbs 31 woman.   She appears to know her identity as a feminine creature loved and valued by God.  She trusts God and the fruit of that trust is her service to others.  She does all that she does — smart and talented as she is — for her household, her family, her husband — out of love for the Lord.  She does not focus on having her needs met, but on meeting the needs of others.  She does not sit at the “gates” of the community “among the elders;” her husband does (v.23).  She practices self-control because “she opens her mouth with wisdom” (not foolishness) and “the teaching of kindness is on her tongue” (v. 26).

If we cannot praise the first woman, Eve, because she doubted and was deceived, then think about it.  Why can we praise the Proverbs 31 woman?    One of the early church fathers, St. Bernard of Clairvaux, wrote, “You have been enabled to reject the deceitful glory of the world . . . you deserve to be praised for not being deceived.”

So, then, “the heart of her husband trusts in her.”

Eve was tempted by a distortion of truth.  Vulnerable — and not trusting God, she allowed herself to be deceived.  I venture to say that the Proverbs 31 woman, living in a fallen and sinful world, was also tempted by distortions of truth.  But, every time she put her trust in God, she was able to reject the “progressive” trends, lifestyles, and behaviors of the world around her.

In being submissive (remember gals: Jesus is God, yet He was submissive to the Father), a wife can win her husband for the Lord even if he is disobedient to the Word.  It is not a woman’s outer appearance that influences a man so much as it is the “hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious” (1 Peter 3:1-4).  This is how “holy women” who put their hope in God have always adorned themselves (v. 5).

So, then, “the heart of her husband trusts in her.”

Now, it’s time to get personal.  I’m a wife.  I’ve had my “Eve days” and my “Proverbs 31 woman” days.  The prince of darkness likes to see me in conflict.  But, when the Holy Spirit nudges me out of myself to see the men in my life, I recognize their fragility.  My husband and sons, my dad and brother, my brother-in-laws and uncles all know how to tackle the “hard work” of life, make their way through obstacles, and faithfully provide for and cover their families.  But, they often aren’t sure what to do with the relational side.  They may appear strong, but feel weak.  They may seem heartless, but feel wounded.  They may look confidant and even arrogant, but feel like a failure.  The heart of a man needs the “gentle and quiet spirit” of a godly woman.

The Proverbs 31 woman was aware of the feminine influence God had given to her, but she was not deceived into abusing that influence.  I wonder: Could her husband open up to her because he knew she would bring him good not harm?  Could he have confidence in her respect for him even when she disagreed with his leadership?   Could he trust her to act rightly toward him no matter if she was having a good — or bad — day?  Could he depend on her for an encouraging word, even in the midst of difficulty?  I think so.

So, then, “the heart of her husband trusts in her.”

In all of my travels and all of my conversations with both men and women, I hear the same message: Wives need loving affirmation, conversation, and commitment.  Husbands need respect.  They receive this respect in a number of ways including intimacy, companionship, and domestic support and admiration.  The “heart of her husband trusts in her” when she speaks well of him to his children and in the community.  A godly man knows when he’s failing.  When his wife speaks well of him in front of children or friends, he knows she isn’t giving him a pass or letting him off the hook.  What he recognizes and values is her loyalty and “gentle and quiet spirit.”  This encourages him to try harder, to do better.

Well, that’s how I see it.  Anyone reading this may disagree.  That’s o.k.  I’m not calling myself a Proverbs 31 woman because I too often act like Eve.   The struggle within me between deception and truth rages on.  But, I have hope:

Those whose eyes rest on the Savior’s Cross will be renewed and transformed.  Those who trust the Lord will obtain the wisdom needed to oppose deceit.

So… “the heart of her husband trusts in her.”  He praises her, not because of what she does, but because she has been enabled to reject the deceit of the world.

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To Tear Down… or Build Up?

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Identity, Relationships, Vocation, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 5, 2010| 1 Comment »

“It is not good,” said the Lord God, “that man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him” (Genesis 2:18).

Let’s assume a Biblical understanding of the word “helper.”  A “helper” (Hebrew: ezer) is defined as being an “assistant” or an “ally.”   Perhaps most significantly, it is a description of God Himself.  Before Jesus returned to heaven, He promised His disciples that He would send “another Helper” (John 14:16).  That “Helper” is the Holy Spirit who is described as a “comforter” (Greek: parakletos) or someone who appears on anothers behalf.  Some commentaries speak of the Holy Spirit as an “encourager.”   The Holy Spirit imparts truth.  Builds up.  Strengthens.

I am not demeaned or offended to be a “helper fit for” man.  There is order and purpose to everything that God does.  God is order, the opposite of chaos.  The Holy Spirit is the Third Person of the Trinity — Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, yet the three are equal.  The Holy Spirit is not inferior to the Father or the Son, but plays a different role.  Lives are affected through the power of the Spirit’s presence as He helps, comforts, and encourages.

In the created order, woman is not inferior to man but plays a powerfully different role.  Her presence and the way she chooses to use her natural power affects the lives of others.

Will she choose to use this power to discourage or encourage?  To bring pain or comfort?  To tear down or build up?

Man was created to be a good steward over all the earth, a defender of life, a tender covering over his wife, and the mentor of children and grandchildren.  But, he can’t do this by himself.  He needs the Word of God.  After that, he needs a helper.  That helper, said God, is woman.

How a woman helps, especially in her vocation as a wife, is explained by the way in which the first woman was made.  “The rib that the Lord God had taken from the man He made into a woman . . .” (Genesis 2:22).   The Hebrew word for “rib” is commonly used for a structural component related to the side of something.  When speaking of a building, it may mean a pillar or beam.  But, when used in reference to a person, it generally means a “rib bone.”   In the structure of our anatomy, the rib guards the human heart and breath of life.  Martin Luther called his wife, Katie, his “rib.”  I am my husband’s rib.   The rib is a strong bone, but it is also easily fractured or broken, especially when under attack.  Women — and the men that women love — are vulnerable in a sinful world.

In this fallen and difficult world, a woman helps her husband by being a pillar supportive of his personhood and his vocations.  Those vocations, or callings, include his stewardship, fatherhood, employment on behalf of family, and respected place in community.  How does she do this, yet remain fearless in the face of her own vulnerability?

She clings to her identity as God’s creation and the treasure for whom Jesus Christ gave all He had.  This identity never changes, no matter the circumstances.  Some women think their identity is found in being a wife, mother, teacher, musician, care-giver, or friend.  Some find their identity in their appearance, popularity, or health.  All of these vocations and circumstances are in a constant state of change.  Our identity as God’s creation and the treasure of Christ never changes… no matter if our children grow up or we lose our job, best friend, or health.

When a woman trusts her identity in Christ, she is free to use her natural power in positive ways.  She doesn’t have to control the people or circumstances in her life, but can practice self-control for the good of her neighbor.  In a marriage, that neighbor is her husband.  She has the power to make or break or husband; to build up or tear down.

Some women know they have this power.  They make a conscious decision to assume control.  Some women are clueless about this power.  They may slowly and painfully destroy their husbands with cruel and insensitive words and behaviors.  Perhaps, feeling small, they try to build themselves up by tearing their husbands down.  Both kinds of women have the same core problem: Their foundation is unsure.  They have forgotten (or never been taught) their identity in Christ.   There is another woman.  She is keenly aware of the power entrusted to her by God; therefore, she strives to use that power for good.  She knows her identity is sure and certain, no matter the circumstances.  She turns outward from self to others and, in so doing, brings glory to God.

God’s Word in the book of Proverbs speaks of a woman’s power — and choice.   “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones” (12:4).  “The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down” (14:1).  “A wife’s quarreling is a continual dripping of rain.  House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord” (19:13-14).

The power of a woman — the helper, pillar and rib — is life-affecting and life-changing.  Disciplined, it is awesome.  Undisciplined, it is dangerous.

Will a woman choose to tear down… or build up?  The answer to this question doesn’t only affect men.  It affects children — for generations to come.

This ezerwoman will continue to ponder and think aloud on the journey.  In the meantime, you’re invited to visit Titus 2 for Life.

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From Another Ezer

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Commentaries of others, Culture Shifts, Faith & Practice, Identity on October 30, 2010| Leave a Comment »

Dear Linda,

Your leadership retreat was instructive on so many levels — it is obvious that you are in the middle of God’s will for you.

In a parking lot the other day, I listened to a replay of President Obama’s speech to a gay, lesbian, bi-sexual and transgender crowd on the radio.  While listening, I noticed the store in front of me had colored flashing lights advertising their sale items.  As I heard the President speak about “equality for all,” a sadness came over me… and a dread for what lies ahead for our “free” nation.  The depth and breadth of deception among every segment of society — good people, mostly — is staggering.  The flashing colored lights right in front of me could have read: “Gay orgy inside at 9 p.m.” and nobody would think it odd.

Work like yours will have an impact on young men and women who are marginal — who question who they are as they try to find their place in the culture.  This work is critical — teaching the “truth alternative.”  The floodgates are open now, the deceiver is laughing at the righteous.  But the Word of God is life-giving and sharper than any two-edged sword, plunging to the soul and spirit as if to divide them.

God has prepared you for this time of moral anarchy.  As you sat completely composed in your darling armchair teaching us how to lead women and girls into the truth of who they are, I thought of the hours/years you must have been on your knees to be able to so beautifully reflect God.  It is my privilege to know and partner with you in this great ministry to man: male and female.

Barb

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Thinking About Men

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Culture Shifts, Faith & Practice, Identity, Relationships, tagged , , , , , , , , , , on October 29, 2010| Leave a Comment »

God has entrusted to men a noble and high calling.  I truly believe that, in my vocation as a woman (ezer, “helper”), I am called to encourage men to be all that God has made them to be.

I must pause here to note that I’ve been surrounded by godly men.  They, themselves, would admit that they are far from perfect.  They have failed.  But, aware of their high calling, they have never abused, abandoned or left me uncovered and at risk.

Without a doubt, there are women who do not trust men because they have been deeply hurt by them.  On several occasions, while speaking to this or that group, I’ve recognized the pain and anger in the body language of a woman in the audience.  In a way, I am grateful when the angry woman approaches me because I am given the opportunity to do two things: 1) Validate her feelings, not because I can understand them, but because they are real; and 2) Point her to the perfect Man, Jesus Christ who loves, respects, covers, restores, and heals all women — no matter what the circumstances.

Yes, men have hurt women.  But, the modern feminist movement with its twisted and distorted sense of equality has struck a cruel and damaging blow to men.   Men may respond in anger or passivity, neither of which are good for women.   I fear for the family — indeed, our nation — when men are openly disrespected, labeled “idiots,” and demeaned in every sort of way.

Over the years, I’ve spoken to groups of younger and older men.  In a Bible study entitled Called To Remember (Lutherans For Life or Concordia Publishing House), I encourage men by reminding them how much women, children and society need them.  I’ve also apologized to them for the ways women tease, confuse, and fail to respect Biblical manhood.

God created women to be faithful and discerning helpers of men because “it was not good that man be alone” (Genesis 2:18).  When given the choice, why would a woman who loves the Lord choose to tear a man down rather than build him up?  Why would a daughter of God in Christ turn from her special role to covet that of another?  Even if she has been hurt, why would a thinking woman fall to the behavior of a cruel and abusive man?

Silly women play competitive games with men.  Odd, I think, that women who have been given the ability to bear life, connect men to children, shape attitudes, build relationships, and nurture a future of hope would despise such awesome privilege.  God created male and female to be equal, but He didn’t make them at the same time, in the same way, or for the same purpose.

There is a lot more I’d like to say, but here’s my conclusion (for now).  I am a better woman because of godly men: my dad, husband, two sons, four grandsons,  father-in-law, brother, two brother-in-laws, and twelve nephews.  Do we think and act differently?  Oh yes.  Do they frustrate me?  Oh yes.  Do they disappoint me?  Oh yes.  But, when danger lurks at my door, I want to stand behind my husband.  When an unhealthy culture concerns me, I want to look to my Christian sons and see hope.  When silly women weary me, I want to step away for awhile to enjoy the company of sane and sensible men.

In every way I can, I promise to support and encourage the men that God places in my life.   It seems to me this will be to everyone’s advantage — male and female.

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A Letter from God

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Identity, Relationships, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 22, 2010| 1 Comment »

What does God say to women?  His letter to us reads something like this:

Dear Daughter,

I loved you before I created you.  You are my masterpiece.  But, sin has distorted My perfect creation.  Sinful people are challenged by difficult choices.  You, My daughter, are tempted by feelings and emotions.  You can’t trust these emotions, but you can always trust Me.  Your life is of such value to Me that I came to earth in the person of Jesus Christ — the God become Man willing to rescue you from the consequences of sin.  I paid the highest price for you.

Because of this great price, your body is not your own — to do with as you please.  It was covered by the Robe of Righteousness when Jesus shed His blood on the Cross.  The sacrifice of Jesus, your Savior, made you a new creation.  You have the promise of heaven.  I don’t want you to be hurt.  I don’t want your heart to be broken or your body abused.  So please, daughter.  Guard your body, mind, and soul by making choices that glorify Me.

It’s o.k. to rebel.  Rebel against all that is sinful and wrong in this world.  Dare to be different from those who follow worldly opinions.  They chase after popularity and selfish ambitions.  When they do wrong, they want you to do wrong, too.  They say, “Follow your heart,” or “Do whatever feels right for you.”  But, a sinful heart cannot be trusted.  It is filled with all manner of bad things.  Your feelings and moods blow with the wind.  They are high and low like a rollercoaster.  Look to Me, My daughter.  I never change.  You can trust your life to Me.  I know you better than you know yourself.  I know your thoughts… your desires… your needs.  You are never alone in My world.

I didn’t create you to be sexy, but holy.  Practice modesty in the way you speak, act, and dress.  Call attention not to yourself, but to Me — the One who made you.  Show your beauty not by revealing your body, but revealing your love for Me.  Resist being a temptress and, instead, lead others away from sin with its ugly consequences.

Be alert to deception.  My daughter, if you acknowledge Me to be God, your Father, then you also acknowledge the evil one who opposes me and despises you.  He hates you because I love you so much.  He will try to deceive you.  He knows when you are vulnerable.  He will tempt you with one question, “Did your Father really say . . .?”  Then, when you doubt Me and fall to deception and sin, the tempter becomes your accuser, “Look at what you have done!  Can your Father ever forgive you?”

Oh, yes, My daughter.  I can and do forgive.  There is nothing you need to do but confess your sin.  In your sorrow, I reach down to lift you from despair and secure the Robe of Righteousness tighter around you.  Forgiven and set free, you are no longer captive to your past.   Satan may tempt you again and again, but I have given you dominion over the father of lies.

Don’t let anyone look down on you for being young.  Instead, let your speech, behavior, love, faith, and purity be an example for others.  Entrust your life to Me.  I’m not a god of chaos, but the God of order and beautiful design.  I made you to be a woman.  Live as a woman — My daughter — while you wait for Jesus to return for you.

Your identity is not found in your appearance or what you do.  Your identity is a creation of God and the treasure for whom Christ gave all He had.  No matter the circumstances in your life, that identity remains.

I am the King… the Lord of life.  Think of what that makes you, My daughter.

With the greatest love of all,

Your Heavenly Father

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We Have Choices

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Life issues, Relationships, Vocation, tagged , , , , , , , , , on October 21, 2010| 1 Comment »

Marriage is a grand idea.  God designed it.  One man + one woman + God = joy!

The male and the female: equal, but not the same.  Compatible.  Complementary.  Two hands from two bodies playing one song on the keyboard of life.  God bringing forth new life from one union.  A procreative masterpiece.

Sigh.  Now, in a fallen world, it is difficult (if not impossible) to imagine the perfection of God’s design.  Marriage, like all relationships, is challenged.  In the spiritual battle between life and death; good and evil; God and satan, marriage is attacked — relentlessly.  Why?  Because it is the cornerstone of civilization, a “nest” for children, and the hope for generations to come.

But, even in the most challenged marriages, God can (and does) work.  When we see our role of husband or wife as one of our vocations, we better understand our call to “love our neighbor as ourselves.”  A husband serves his neighbor (his wife).  A wife serves her neighbor (her husband).  Together, both serve their little neighbors (their children).  God doesn’t need us to do anything for Him, said Martin Luther, but our neighbor does.  God works through us to serve our neighbors.

Are we challenged in our service of others?  Oh, yes.  Even in the closest of families there are differences in personalities, mannerisms, preferences, perspectives, patience, confidence, show of love, and even humor.  The lessons learned while growing up, personal experiences, and a motly mix of genes shape one person to be a little (or a lot) different from another.  Still…

In marriage, as in all relationships, we have choices.  We can build up, or tear down.  We can focus on what’s working, or what’s not.  We can serve, or wait to be served.

Contentment in marriage doesn’t come when someone acts the way we think we’d like them to.  Contentment doesn’t depend on one person making the other happy or filling them up or meeting their needs.

Contentment is a “core” thing; it’s from the Cross.  A Cross-focus rather than a “me” focus changes husband and wife, saint and sinner, from the inside out.  Personalities and quirky habits remain, but a Cross-focused “core” changes our attitude.  Attitude changes behavior.

Our response to our neighbor reveals our “core,” no matter if they make us happy or sad.

We love because He first loved us.

(1 John 4:9)  In response to Jesus’ sacrificial love for us, how do we choose to love our neighbor?

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Raquel Regrets

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Commentaries of others, Culture Shifts, Faith & Practice, Life issues, Relationships, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on October 19, 2010| Leave a Comment »

Titus 2 for Life is a mentoring ministry that honors God’s model for positively affecting society.  The flow of mentoring is older to younger.  “Older” is more than age.  It is experience and spiritual maturity.  Typically, with age, we become wiser.  We’ve made mistakes and hopefully learned from them.  It is unfortunate when the “younger” see little need for sage advice.

History is real.  It happened.  Of course, the best one to tell it — and explain the lessons learned from it — is the person who lived it.  I’ve been reading several stories of “older” women who were supposedly “modern” and “unbounded” earlier in their lives who now have a different perspective.

Matt Kaufman notes one.  He writes:

“Sometimes family-values talk comes from unexpected sources.  Like Raquel Welch.  Writing for CNN on the 50th anniversary of the Pill, the 69-year-old actress regrets that it took ‘the caution and discernment out of choosing a sexual partner, which used to be the equivalent of choosing a life partner.’  As a result, she writes, ‘nobody seems able to . . . honor a commitment.’

“Welch regrets her own track record in this area, too.  ‘I’m ashamed’ — how many celebs use that word? — ‘to admit that I myself have been married four times.  And yet I still feel that it is the cornerstone of civilization, an essential institution that stablilizes society, provides a sanctuary for children and saves us from anarchy.’

“There’s more.  Welch deplores ‘promiscuity.’  She says ‘any sane person’ must make a moral ‘judgment’ about certain sexual practices.  She even sounds pro-life: When she got pregnant, she realized ‘this process was not about me,’ but about the ‘life’ inside her.

“In a new book, Welch says she’s reconnected with her Christian upbringing and regularly attends church and Bible study.”  (Matt Kaufman, Focus on the Family CITIZEN)

What do you have to say about that?


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The Essence

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Relationships, Vocation on October 15, 2010| Leave a Comment »

On Fridays, Diane Summers calls from KFUO radio in St. Louis.  Her program, “The Essence,” is music interspersed with devotional thoughts and observations on life under the Cross.  For 10-12 minutes, Diane is kind to focus on various aspects of Titus 2 for Life.  Diane understands.  We share the same worldview.  She reads my thoughts (can someone do that?) and the conversation flows.  But, then, why wouldn’t it when our common foundation is The Word?

Today, however, Diane caught me by surprise.  I was blogging.  I was taking time out from a week of filling soup bowls.  You know.  Lots and lots of people gather around: hungry and in need of filling up.  I’m not the pot.  More correctly, I’m the ladle used to serve out of The Pot (God’s Word).  That’s what an ezer does.  She’s a “helper.”  A server of helpfulness and encouragement.   Anyway…

There was Diane’s voice: “In a minute, we’re on.  You set?”  Near panic.  Queasy feeling.  But, when one can draw upon the Word of the Lord, one suddenly has something to say.  We “chatted” about the Titus 2 Retreat in Cedar Rapids, IA., last weekend.  We discussed the influence of the world on women and the ways that “older” woman can be of help to “younger” women.  “In the last days,” writes St. Paul to Timothy, “there will be times of difficulty.  For people will be lovers of self . . . ” (2 Timothy 3:1-5).  Such people “creep into households and capture weak women, burdened with sins and led astray by various passions, always learning and never able to arrive at a knowledge of the truth” (vv. 6-7).

Diane understood where I was going… and a healthy dialogue followed.  We talked about how, in Rome, false teachers came to the doors of women at home.  Today, they do the same thing, entering our very homes by way of the internet, television personalities, and self-help books.  We are easily swayed, especially when in the midst of difficult circumstances.

Afterward, Diane laughed.  “That was fun!”  Then she added, “You didn’t seem caught by surprise at all.”

Well, here’s the thing.  When we fear — indeed, cling — to God, we are provided with all that is necessary for each moment of life — even when caught by surprise.  God is faithful.

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Hope and Healing

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Life issues, tagged , , , , , , , , , , on October 7, 2010| Leave a Comment »

Last year, in Arizona, I was asked by a friend from Canada to have lunch with the daughter of her friend.  My Canadian friend knew about my involvement in Lutherans For Life and Word of Hope.  She knew a little bit of why Titus 2 for Life grew out of my experiences with women grieving after an abortion.  She also knew that her friend’s daughter was interested in starting some sort of caring ministry for women in her area who were affected by their abortions.

So, under a canopy of blue sky, two older and two younger women gathered around an informal table.  We were there to imagine:  What could be done to welcome, encourage, and heal with the amazing love of Jesus?  It was easy to see the passion in Tessie, the woman who desired to begin a post abortion group.  She wore a genuine heart on her sleeve.  But, more than the passion and heart was her conviction and the courage to speak the Truth  For, you see, without the truth, the passion and heart would not bring hope.

I offered my assistance and prayers to Tessie.  We parted ways, but promised to stay in touch by e-mail.  We have.  Tessie is accountable with her “reports” to me and a few trusted others.

In the spring, Tessie started her first group for post abortive women.    By the end of September, she had led three groups.  All of this was done by word of mouth and little posters in area churches.

I asked Tessie about the diversity of the women.  She replied,

“There have been 18 women from the three groups that I’ve led.  They range in ages from 28 to 60+.  The women are mostly Caucasian, with one Hispanic and two African Americans.  Seven are single.  Three are divorced.  Eight are married.  All of the women claim to be Christians.  Three of the women married the father of their aborted child, but one [of those] divorced years later.  Five have had multiple abortions.  Two were late term.”

The eighteen women that Tessie has encircled remind me of the women God has placed in my life.

At last count, 24 of my friends, relatives, or acquaintances have shared their abortion experience with me.  Many of these are women who came up to me after I had finished speaking about Biblical manhood and womanhood.  One woman admitted that was the only reason she could attend the event.  She said, “If you had come to speak about abortion, I wouldn’t have showed up.  But, I was curious about living as a Biblical woman.”  She went on to explain, “When you shared the story of your friend who had an abortion, how did you know?  You were speaking to me.  That was my story.”

Of the 24 women in my “circle” who have suffered an abortion, 18 are Lutheran.  Two are the wives of Lutheran pastors.  At least three have had more than one abortion.

One of the women is someone I’ve known a long time.  We’ve traveled different paths and, because of that, our experiences have resulted in very different consequences.  One day, quite unexpected, she shared a receipt from Planned Parenthood that she keeps in her billfold.  She also shared a cut-out picture of a little girl that, she explained, may have looked like her daughter.  God has done a healing work on this woman.  She will live with the regret the rest of her life but, every morning, she looks in the mirror to see the Robe of Jesus’ Righteousness wrapped securely around her.

Another woman and I nearly lost our friendship after her abortion.  I think it was the first time I realized how divisive the double-edged Sword of God’s Word really is.  She knew she was living on the wrong side of the Sword, but had to defend herself.  In time, that Sword pierced through the denial to change the heart and mind of a beautiful and forgiven woman.  This friend has motivated me to make myself available to women everywhere — through speaking, writing, and the Titus 2 for Life ministry.

To all of these women, God has Words of promise:

Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes in the morning.

When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.  For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was dried up as by the heat of summer.  I acknowledged my sin to You, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,’ and You forgave the iniquity of my sin.

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound . . . to comfort all who mourn . . . to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes.

(Psalm30:5b; 32:3-5; Isaiah 61:1-3)

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