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Archive for July, 2011

Child Protection

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Faith & Practice, Parenting & Education, Sexy or holy?, Vocation, tagged , , , , , , , on July 29, 2011| 1 Comment »

There is a reason God’s Word speaks consistently and often about purity.  It is the best way to protect children in a fallen and sinful world.

We must never fool ourselves by saying we are teaching purity in sex education.  The two concepts don’t mix.  Education in sex is what it says it is.  Instruction in purity is quit different.  God never tells parents to educate children about sex, but to raise their sons and daughters in purity.  He equips parents to do this throughout all of Scripture.

You may think I’m quibbling with words.  But, I’m not.  Take the concepts for what they are.  Trace them to their sources.  Discover the original goal and intention of each.  Then follow the trail of consequences.

We all need to do better in protecting our children.  Many loving Christian parents, with their children’s best interests in mind, have inadvertently and most innocently placed their children in harm’s way.  I don’t say that lightly.  I don’t say that as a mom who did everything right by her children.  But, we Christians can’t just point our fingers at non-Christians and say, “Look!  They are bad!  They let children do whatever they want!”  We can’t just look at Planned Parenthood and say, “Shame on them!  They are cruel!  They wiggle their way into public classrooms to abuse our children!”

We Christian moms and dads must try to be honest.  There is another kind of child abuse.  It is done unintentionally by good parents.  It is done without careful analysis, but for supposedly all the right reasons.  Nevertheless, it is cruel.  It is a form of child abuse.  What would you call starting children in sex ed at an early age, adding more information with every year, putting boys and girls together for intimately graphic conversation and details on birth control, explaining that God wants the act of sex to be saved for marriage, but then telling sons and daughters to wait to marry until after getting their degree and settling into a good job?

We don’t have to unintentionally abuse children.  We can intentionally protect them.  And God tells us how.

He wants parents to teach His definition of love.  In 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, God tells what love is: “patient and kind,” and what it isn’t: “arrogant . . . rude, or insistent on its own way.”

Both fathers and mothers can teach sons and daughters to “have nothing to do with silly myths,” but instead “train for godliness.”  (1 Timothy 4:7-10).  We put scholars and athletes through intense training for a purpose.  Similar training is also required for living in a way that pleases God; for running the “race” of life (1 Corinthians 9:24-26).  Parents can contrast “sexual immorality” and “sensuality” with “patience” and “self-control” (Galatians 5:16-24).

Dads or godly mentors can take boys aside to teach them how to respect women.  “Treat older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity” (1 Timothy 5:1-2).  To practice self-control (Titus 2:6).  Big brothers can guard the virginity of their younger sisters and, if she becomes promiscuous, help her stop (Song of Solomon 8:8-9).

Moms or godly mentors can take girls aside to teach them how to respect and help men.  “. . . [L]et your adorning be . . . beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious” (1 Peter 3:4-5).  How to dress, and why… “with what is proper for women who profess godliness” (1 Timothy 2:9-10).  How to “be self-controlled and pure” (Titus 2:4-5).

Then, even though the world may ridicule young people for saying “no” to sex, we can encourage them:  Don’t let anyone “despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity” (1 Timothy 4:11-12).

God also tells us how to welcome our children when they’ve tried, but failed.  We are to welcome our children as He welcomes us.  “Come to Me,” Jesus always says.  Then, He assures us that when “we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

Tomorrow, in Christ, is brimming with hope.

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Child Abuse

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Culture Shifts, Life issues, Parenting & Education, Sexy or holy?, tagged , , , , , on July 29, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Why don’t we just admit it.  Child abuse is legal in this country.

We call it sex education.  But, in truth, it is child abuse.  Modern sex education abuses children by stripping them of their innocence.  It sexualizes our children.  Comprehensive sex education incorporates sexuality into language, thinking skills, health, science, and life-style.

Educators and parents (consciously or not) put their trust in a child abuser named Alfred Kinsey.  He is called the father of modern sex education.  Children, he said, are “sexual from birth.”  Few people paid any attention to the fact that Kinsey used known pedaphiles to experiment on children for the purpose of research.  His twisted documentation made its way into textbooks.  Homes.  Churches.  Those who share Kinsey’s disrespect for life and the innocence of children stood ready profit.  To further loosen moral restraints.

Removing the innocence of childhood has created a flourishing market for retailers.  The advertising industry.  Pharmaceutical companies.  Healthcare.  Planned Parenthood.  Who other than this government-subsidized monolith more unashamedly vies for the role of sex educator, pushes all manner of sexual paraphernalia, and then provides abortion services (for a fee, you understand).

I haven’t always used the term “child abuse” to describe sex education.  It was Douglas Gresham, the step-son of C.S. Lewis who helped me see it for what it is.  I had written Gresham to invite him as a speaker for Lutherans For Life.  I happened to mention personal efforts to help my church understand the dangers of sex education.  You are right to do so, he said, because “modern sex education is child abuse.”  Gresham knows what he’s talking about.  He ministers to women who’ve suffered sexual abuse and the loss of life through abortion that often follows years of abuse.  I, too, have heard the painful stories of women who became promiscuous after being exposed to early instruction in sexuality or blatantly sinful abuse.

For years, I traveled here and there speaking to boys, girls, and their parents.  I did not explain the intimacies of sex, but rather the uniqueness of male and female.  This was received as a strange and novel idea.  Maybe not surprising considering that moms and dads had been under the influence of Kinsey, too.  I kept asking: Why would we want to teach our children about all things pertaining to sex before first mentoring them to be boys?  Girls?  On the path to Biblical manhood.  Womanhood.

Churches have failed the youngest generations.  That’s what happens when we are deceived.  Fooled.  The world stands before us, hissing, “Did God really say . . . ?”  We look around to see new trends.  Sophistication.  Contemporary teaching.  Then, we fall into doubt.  We rationalize.  And we play the game.  The world wins when we are distracted from our vocation of instructing children in purity to instead educate them in sex.  So, along with others, I continue to encourage my church to please consider the source of modern sex education.  To refuse to wrap Jesus around worldly opinions and trends.

This mother and grandmother has sensitively-in tune antenna.  I sense, hear, and see that modern sex education is recruitment into sexuality.  Therefore, it is child abuse.

Modern sex education:

  • Is not anatomy class.
  • Fails to guard the innocence of children.
  • Breaks down inhibitions by placing boys and girls together in the same classroom.
  • Instructs children to be “comfortable with their bodies.” (And so they are… with girls having no clue as to why two cups and a thong might attract un-gentlemanly attention.)
  • Tempts children to believe they are, first and foremost, “sexual beings.”

When we believe that we are “sexual beings,” then it only follows that we have the “right” to be “sexual.”  That we “need” to be “sexual.”  And, in today’s culture, no one should deny “my rights.”  No one should deny “my needs.”  Well, here’s the truth that I will continue to proclaim: We are — first and foremost — human beings, made in the image of God and, although fallen from that image, we are called to holy living as a man or a woman.  Equal, but different.  Can you imagine how that changes the way we see ourselves and others?  The choices we make?  The way we treat one another?

The media and the general public is angry when a priest sexually abuses a child.  We should be.  But, where is our righteous anger when children fall under the tutorage of Planned Parenthood?   SIECUS?  LGBT and GLSEN-approved textbooks?  Projects such as “It Gets Better,” the “bullying” program initiated by homosexual advocate and leading “sex-advice” columnist Dan Savage?  (Warning: All of these sites are graphic.)

Children are not on this earth for our use.  They are gifts from God.  They are treasures of Jesus Christ.  I stand on this truth as a woman.  A mother.  A grandmother.  Try to prove me wrong.  Take your case before the Creator.  Question your reasons for defending sex education and the source of your information.

Educating children in sex is cruel.  It is a far cry from a parent’s role to instruct sons and daughters in purity.  Remembering our own mistakes, we may fear for our children, but comprehensive sex education does not protect young hearts, minds and souls.  Instruction in purity does.  It allows us to protect our children in ways we, perhaps, were not.

What can a parent do?  For starters, teach boys what it means to be a man.  Girls what it means to be a woman.  There are only two sexes, equal but different.  Teach respect for both.  Resist falling for the lie that “experts” know better how to raise your children.  Help children and teens set goals.  Discuss the consequences of choices. Remind them that their bodies are not their own to do with as they please, but creations of God and valued at high price (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

There is a time for everything.  Childhood is a time for innocence.  Therefore, keep the fence up and the gate closed.

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The 8th Graders of Saugatuck

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Culture Shifts, Faith & Practice, Parenting & Education, tagged , , , , , , , , , on July 27, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Saugatuck, MI., is a pleasant village on the shore of Lake Michigan.  I’ve spent several nights there on my way home from speaking to teens and their parents in the Grand Rapids area.  The first time, I had my cousin along for the trek.  I made reservations at one of the local bed and breakfast establishments as a special treat.  We were not disappointed.  The village of Saugatuck is delightful: cottages with wide front porches, art stores, fine eateries, and the calm of lakeside living.  We visited with everyone we met, including shop-keepers who were comfortable being “out.”

A year or so later, I returned, this time with my daughter-in-law and niece .  I selected a different bed and breakfast for our night’s stay.  By this time, it had been explained to me that Saugatuck is a popular weekend and summer destination for homosexual travelers from the cities.  I guess it’s more than just a destination.  For some, it’s their home.  I know.  The B & B I had chosen for Angie, Lisette and I was home to two women who greeted us, showed us to our rooms, and then invited us to come knock on their bedroom door should we need anything.  Their obviously shared bedroom.  As in “we are a couple” bedroom.

So, you might understand why I took special note when Saugatuck made national news.  In June, the school board rejected a video for its eighth-grade anti-bullying program.  The video’s title is: “Coming Out: What Every Teen (Gay and Straight) Needs to Know.”  Some board members apparently would have supported the video for a sex-ed class, but noted that it had little to do with bullying.

Board member Jason Myers told the Holland Sentinel, “It’s about sexuality.  We got sold on it as something  more about bullying.”  “This does little on the harassment and bullying component,” added board President Mike VanLoon.  “It’s not the bulk of the video.”

Interested in what the homosexual community might have to say, I visited advocate.com.  They reported that the vote was 5-2 against the video.  Joan Lamb, board secretary, voted in favor of the video, noting that educational professionals had endorsed it and few parents opposed it.  Steve Hutchins, who cast the other favorable vote, said Saugatuck’s demographics make it necessary for the school to address gay issues.  Many businesses are owned by or cater to LGBT people.  I remembered our B & B hosts.

Taking the demographics of Saugatuck into consideration, I find the school board’s vote curious.  School boards across the country are under pressure.  In a growing “gay community,” I wouldn’t have been surprised if the vote was 5-2 in favor of the video.  Why?

Dan Savage is the founder of the “It Gets Better” anti-bullying campaign, widely seen in a variety of media outlets.  But, has he adapted a bullying approach of his own — toward parents?

“The whole point of the campaign,” he said in an interview with Salon magazine, “is that we’re not waiting for permission anymore to talk to your kid, whether you want us to or not.”

Daniel Villarreal was just as candid as Savage in his article that appeared on the prominent New York homosexual blog Queerty in May.  “I and a lot of other people want to indoctrinate, recruit, teach and expose children to queer sexuality.”  Many things Savage said are unfit to quote, but the reason “gay activists want educators to teach future generations of children to accept queer sexuality,” he said, is because “our future depends on it.”

It would appear that in the charming village of Saugatuck there is a battle of worldviews.  The school board decision against a video that appeared to teach more about sexuality than anti-bullying may be evidence of conflict, but it is also evidence of hope.  As activists for a behavior with harmful consequences push hard — and boldly — to indoctrinate our children and grandchildren, perhaps they are exposing their true agenda.  They want nothing to do with abstinence education.  They want nothing to do with real marriage or family values.  But, they do want to teach children that they are “sexual from birth” and have every right to express their sexuality any way they choose.  Maybe more and more parents are beginning to recognize the deception and danger.

Saugatuck is a beautiful place.  I would like to visit there again.  In the meantime, I want to think that the two women who hosted my daughter-in-law, niece and I in their home will continue to be hospitable.  Good neighbors.  Self-controlled.  Not in favor of bullying parents… or indoctrinating children.

Excerpts from CITIZEN, August/September 2011 and http://www.advocate.com
Do you want your children under the instruction of Planned Parenthood or SIECUS?
Discover their worldview for yourself by visiting http://www.teenwire.org

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Boldness of Faith in D.C.

Posted in Citizenship, Faith & Practice, Vocation, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 27, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Rep. James Lankford (OK) and Rep. Tim Scott (SC) are Christians who unashamedly discuss their faith — in the home, on the job and against political odds.  Both are in their 40s.  Both were raised in less than perfect homes but with God’s Word.  The book of Nehemiah convinced Rep. Lankford to take the path to Capitol Hill.  Biblical mentors encouraged Rep. Scott to work his way toward Congress.

Both Reps. Lankford and Scott are fully aware of the ideological and spiritual battles in Washington, D.C.  Rep. Scott is pro-life, a faithful pray-er, and a defender of Biblical values.  He has sponsored legislation that prevents unions from demanding mandatory dues; thus halting the devastating effects that unions have imposed on the federal budget and socially conservative values.  Unions spend hundreds of millions to undermine marriage, the sanctity of human life, parent’s rights, and other values that are cherished by the very members who pay the dues, but have no say on how the money is spent.

Rep. Lankford says he is grounded by the wisdom of Proverbs.  “How do we handle debt as a nation?” he asks.  “A wise man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children.  We [are spending] the inheritance of our children’s children.  So, how do we correct that?  How are we able to honor the poor . . . promote justice . . . [practice] what is right and just?”

He continues, “I don’t know of another generation of leaders that has said, ‘Times are tough.  I’m going to make it tougher on my kids to make it easier for me.’  As weird as it may sound . . . debt is the moral issue of the day.”

“At the heart of many of the problems facing our country stands an institution under siege,” Lankford proclaims.  “That institution is the American family.  The best way to ensure a strong nation is to have strong families.”  The U.S. Department of Justice announced on February 24 that it would no longer defend the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act.  Lankford took to the House floor to call out the hypocrisy.  “Many in this chamber are aware of my . . . Biblical worldview.  I am unashamed of my personal faith in Jesus Christ . . . I believe words have meaning . . . the meaning of marriage is the union between a man and a woman.  The Defense of Marriage Act codified that definition into law . . . this issue is well beyond faith . . . or social or political issue.  Marriage is now not only the center of a national social debate, but also a constitutional debate.”

Scriptural warnings, said Lankford, are clear for politicians and for the church.  “We have a first responsibility to take care of those in poverty.  To take care of our own families.  To take care of the needs around us.  The more that the church backs up from that, the more the government engages in it . . . [T]he more the nation and the family break down, the more social services are needed.  But, the more strong families you have, the less government you have . . . so we have this endless cycle that we have got to pull out of.  The only way to pull out is [to have] churches engaging in [preserving the] family.”

Are we raising sons and daughters with a Biblical worldview so that they can be morally upright citizens?  Marry and start a family?  Use their skills through honest labor?  Become involved parents?  Not be burdened by our failure to invest in the future?

Lankford says it’s not about what you do, but whom you follow, that should define you: “My calling is first and foremost not to an occupation.  It is to follow a person.  My calling is to follow Christ.”

Rep. Scott agrees.  He tries to surround himself with believers that “keep me accountable.”  There is “peace and direction for me in my leadership role,” he says, quoting Psalm 23 and Luke 6:38.

The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not be in want . . . He restores my soul . . . I will fear no evil . . .

Give, and it will be given to you.  A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap.  For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

Excerpts from CITIZEN, August/September 2011

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Never Poured Out to Empty

Posted in Faith & Practice, Relationships, Vocation, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 25, 2011| 1 Comment »

My friend and mentor, Joanie, knew she was engaged in daily spiritual battle.  Her soul and the souls of those around her were targets for the enemy of our lives.  It was for this reason that Joanie tightly grasped the Sword of Truth.  “God’s Word is all I need.”

Once, while walking through a deep valley in her life, Joanie asked me to write out the words of Lamentations 3:21-23 (KJV):  “This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope.  It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not.  They are new every morning: great is Thy faithfulness.”  I wrote out a second copy for myself.

One of Joanie’s favorite authors was Oswald Chambers.  His book, My Utmost for His Highest, is in our home library.  At a time when I was feeling insignificant and unappreciated, my husband asked me to read a page he had marked in the book.  There, Chambers quoted Philippians 2:17 (NIV):  “But even if I am being poured out as a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you.”  Chambers’ commentary reads:

“Are you willing to sacrifice yourself for the work of another believer — to pour out your life sacrificially for the ministry and faith of others?  Or do you say, ‘I am not willing to be poured out right now, and I don’t want God to tell me how to serve Him.  I want to choose the place of my own sacrifice.  And I want to have certain people watching me saying, ‘Well done.’ ”

Chambers had my attention.  I was compelled to read on.

“It is one thing to follow God’s way of service if you are regarded as a hero, but quite another thing if the road marked out for you by God requires becoming a ‘doormat’ under other people’s feet.  God’s purpose may be to teach you to say, ‘I know how to be abased . . .’ (Philippians 4:12).  Are you ready to be sacrificed like that?  Are you ready to be less than a mere drop in the bucket — to be so totally insignificant that no one remembers you even if they think of those you served?  Are you willing to give and be poured out until you are used up and exhausted — not seeking to be ministered to, but to minister?”

I am thankful that my husband was drawn to this particular commentary from Chambers’ book.  I reflect on it whenever I’m tempted by my human nature:  Does anyone notice my hard work?  Does anyone see how “poured out” I am?  Will I be credited for my help?  Then I think about Joanie.  She was always pouring herself out for others.  She was my hero, but the life marked out for her required becoming a doormat.

Joanie was willing to be insignificant — to give and minister to others — all the while calling attention to the Savior Jesus Christ.  In turn, something amazing happened.  Joanie was never poured out to empty.  God’s Spirit filled her with enough for each day.  His compassions never failed.  They were new every morning.

Poured out?  Unappreciated?  Used up?  God sent me Joanie whose life assured me: “Great is Thy faithfulness.”  As I pour out to His glory, He is faithful to fill up.

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Whatever You’ve Got Going, Lord!

Posted in Faith & Practice, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 24, 2011| 1 Comment »

Joanie was scheduled for surgery.  “I’m getting my affairs in order,” she told me.

Joanie had come into my life as an older, wiser friend not long after my mom died.  She became my mentor.  A reminder that God’s Word is all that matters.  A reminder that Jesus is that Word for my life.

“My surgery is to repair an aneurysm,” Joanie explained.  “It’s a routine procedure.  But, whatever the Lord’s got going here is fine with me.”

A few days before the surgery, Joanie’s two daughters flew in to be with her.  Joanie called to tell me she had a grand idea.  “We’re going to have a joyful night on the town.”  Later, I learned that night was special indeed.  Over a leisurely dinner, Joanie and her daughters shared many memories.  They laughed, then cried, then laughed some more as they lingered over a single glass of white Zinfandel.  Later, they returned home to curl up in the living room where they continued their story-telling late into the night.  Somehow, I had no difficulty hearing Joanie tell her daughters, “I gotta tell you girls.  Whatever the Lord’s got going here is fine with me.”

When Joanie’s son called to say he would drive down to be with her, she assured him there was no need.  “You stay with your family right now.  I’ll see you soon.”  Then she penned him a loving letter with words that can only flow from a mother’s heart.  The note ended, “Whatever the Lord’s got going here is fine with me.”

On the morning of the surgery, Joanie woke early.  She slipped out the back door to say good-bye to her two dogs, the faithful companions who greeted her this morning as they did every morning.  Coming back inside, she slowly walked through the rooms of the house, touching her lips and planting a “kiss” on the photo faces of her husband, children, and grandchildren.  She sighed, then picked up the bag she had carefully packed the night before.  With one quick glance over her shoulder back at the house, she walked to the car.  No one but her Father heard her say, “Whatever you’ve got going here, Lord, is fine with me.”

The surgery did not go as expected.  There were too many complications.  My friend’s body grew weak and could no longer fight the battle of life over death.  In the distance, she could hear the great choir of heavenly angels praising God.  “Whatever you’ve got going here, Lord, is fine with me.”  Then, a brief hesitation.  Did Joanie hear one of her daughters say, “We must let her go.”  Did she hear the other cry, “No!”  Joanie waited as if she were giving her daughter time to adjust her thinking and receive the same peace that was now flowing through the mother.  It was not easy, but both daughters agreed, “Mom is ready.”  And they entrusted her to God.

Days later, Joanie’s daughters opened the bag which their mom had packed for her hospital stay.  In it were all the things that a woman would take for recovery from surgery — a few toiletries, nightgown, photo or two of her family, books for passing the time, and well-worn Bible.  Looking through the items in the bag, they paused to remember the behavior of their mom the morning she left home for the hospital.  They heard her sigh and saw her lingering glance at the house.  They knew she had written a “good-bye” letter of encouragement to her son.  But, at the same time, here was a bag filled with the items one would need for life.

Joanie truly believed, “Whatever you’ve got going, Lord, is fine with me.”  She lived each day ready to do those things God had already prepared for her to do, yet she kept her eyes focused on the Savior who would one day carry her home.  In the time that I had know her, Joanie spoke with excitement about her eternal home with Jesus.  Yet, never had I met anyone more content to be in the present — loving souls and sharing the Word of life.

Joanie departed my life much too soon.  Plans had been made for her to spend a week in my home.  I anticipated that visit.  I needed more time learning at the feet of my mentor.  Learning how to adjust my attitude.  Learning to focus less on self and more on Christ.  That visit did not happen, but others will.  With all confidence, I anticipate daily visits with Joanie in our Father’s house.

With eagerness, Joanie expected Jesus to come for her.  She only hoped she would not stand before Him ashamed.  Therefore, whether she lived or died, it would be to the glory of her Heavenly Father (Philippians 1:20-21).

“Whatever You’ve got going here Lord is fine with me.”

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Sexual Menu?

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Commentaries of others, Culture Shifts, Faith & Practice, Life issues, Parenting & Education, Relationships, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 16, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Seems that New York has followed the lead of my fellow sophisticated Iowans.   Same-sex “marriage” has just become law there, too.  People like me who don’t believe we have the right to define an institution created by God justifiably oppose tampering with marriage and parenthood.  But, we are told, not to worry!  Legalizing same-sex “marriage” won’t hurt a thing.

I disagree.  So does Michael Cook, the editor of Mercatornet.  In his article of July 11, he asks: “Anything else on the menu?”

He offers three reasons why the legalization of same-sex “marriage” will, indeed, affect our culture.  All come from authors featured in the New York Times.  First, Michael Cook notes the commentary of Katherine M. Franke, a Columbia University law professor.  She confessed that she really didn’t want to marry her long-time lesbian partner anyway.  Why lose the flexibility and benefits of living as domestic partners?  Cook quotes professor Franke, saying as far as she was concerned, “we think marriage ought to be one choice in a menu of options by which relationships can be recognized and gain security.”

“One choice in a menu of legally supported relationships?” Cook asks.  “How long is the menu?”

Cook offers a second reason why legalizing same-sex “marriage” will impact society by highlighting another article in the Times by Ralph Richard Banks.  Banks is a professor at Stanford Law School.  What comes after gay “marriage”?  Banks “puts his money on polygamy and incest” because legal prohibitions on either practice are losing strength.  Society forbade them in the past because they were seen as “morally reprehensible;” therefore, society felt “justified in discriminating against them.”  I follow Banks’ reasoning.  Just as homosexual advocates are working hard to shift our thinking and normalize the behavior God calls a sin, so will advocates of polygamy and incest.

Two more behaviors, Cook notes, are added to the “menu of [sexual] options.”

The third reason why legalized same-sex “marriage” will have a domino affect on the culture is voiced by Dan Savage.  The Times describes Savage as “America’s leading sex-advice columnist.”  He is syndicated in at least 50 newspapers.  Here’s what Cook writes about Savage.  “Savage, who claims to be both ‘culturally Catholic’ and gay, thinks that gay couples have a lot to teach heterosexual couples, especially about monogamy.  Idealising monogamy destroys families, he contends.  Men are simply not made to be monogamous.  Until feminism came along, men had mistresses and visited prostitutes.  But instead of extending the benefits of the sexual revolution to women, feminism imposed a chastity belt on men.  ‘And it’s been a disaster for marriage,’ he says.  What we need, in his opinion, is relationships which are open to the occasional fling — as long as partners are open about it.”

Cook continues, “Traditional marriage — well, actually real marriage — is and has always been monogamous and permanent.  There have been and always will be failures.  But that is the ideal to which couples aspire.  They marry ‘for better or worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part’.  The expectation is exclusivity in a life-long commitment.”

Cook believes that legalization of same-sex “marriage” will most assuredly “affect the attitudes of young couples who are thinking of marriage a decade from now . . . it will be one of a number of options . . . they will have different expectations . . . marriage will include acceptance of infidelity, will not necessarily involve children, and will probably only last a few years.”

Advocates of same-sex “marriage” in New York say it’s good for marriage.  Cook concludes:

“In a way, they’re right.  Just as World War II was good for Germany because out of the ashes, corpses and rubble arose a heightened sense of human dignity and a democratic and peaceful government, same-sex marriage will heighten our esteem for real marriage.  But in the meantime, the suffering will be great.”

Amen.

Mercatornet: Navigating modern complexities
Check it out!

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Sexual Trail Blazing

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Culture Shifts, Faith & Practice, Identity, Life issues, Parenting & Education, Relationships, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 15, 2011| 1 Comment »

Yesterday, California’s Gov. Jerry Brown signed into law legislation that requires the state’s schools to teach the contributions of people who are lesbian, bisexual, “gay,” and transgender.

S.B. 48 makes California the first state in the union to pass such a law.  It was authored by Senator Mark Leno of San Francisco, a homosexual.  The law requires textbooks be re-written to include information about LBGT Americans and “present them in a positive light.”

Students as young as six will be affected.  Parental notification is not required.  Parents cannot opt their children out.

The governor says the bill prohibits “discrimination in education.”  He stated that “history should be honest.”

For the sake of honesty:

  1. What is the driving force behind this law?  What is the desired outcome?  Who does it benefit?
  2. To whom are children entrusted: their parents or the school?
  3. If parents teach God’s Word to their children because it protects them from harm, why would the governor, teacher’s association, or school want to contradict parents?
  4. Why does the bill prohibit teachers and textbooks from telling students that homosexuality is a risky lifestyle?  The practice of homosexuality carries with it the highest rate of HIV/AIDS and other STDs, high cancer rates, and earlier deaths.

It has always been a good thing to teach young people about the contributions of earlier Americans.  But, honestly, where is the textbook describing the contributions of George Washington the heterosexual?  Clara Barton the heterosexual?  Martin Luther King, Jr. the heterosexual?

Apparently S.B. 48 is California’s eighth school sexual indoctrination law forcing itself on parents and children.  What will this trend in sexual trail blazing leave behind?

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Foolish Women

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Culture Shifts, Faith & Practice, Identity, Relationships, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 15, 2011| Leave a Comment »

To be sure, men can be foolish, too.  Still, I am intrigued by the fact that the book of Proverbs calls attention to foolish woman.  As a woman, it seems appropriate for me to pick up on this — and ponder.

Light contrasts dark.  Hope contrasts despair.  God’s Word contrasts deception.  In Proverbs, God teaches the way of wisdom by contrasting it to foolishness.  So, I’m pondering the following verses.  And, I’m thinking of the hopeful difference women could make if they responded with wisdom in contrast to foolishness.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones”(12:4).

The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down” (14:1).

. . . [A] wife’s quarreling is a continual dripping of rain.  House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord” (19:13b-14).

It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife” (21:9; 25:24; 21:19).

As long as women are deceived by the world, we will remain foolish.  Fretful.  Impatient.  We will fall to the idolatry of self.  Expect others to make us happy.  Blame them when they don’t.  Our houses will become cold.  Unwelcoming.  Without mercy.   But, there is hope.  There is always hope!

The remedy for foolishness is to be in God’s Word (Proverbs 2:1).  (All of His Word, not just the passages we like.)  Jesus Christ is the Word that brings people from darkness to light.  Sets captives free.  A foolish world is overcome by Jesus Christ.  One day, it will pass away and be no more.   For now, He commands the dawn to know its place and takes hold of the skirts of the earth (Job 38:12-13).  Evil, disguised as good, is being shaken and exposed.

If we want to be wise — even in the midst of those who think themselves sophisticated and progressive — we must know Christ.  Not just quote Him, but study Him.  Then seek to follow Him.  Turn away from silly myths.  Tell Satan to jump a cliff.  Be repentant for wrong choices of the past and begin to trust the Creator of our lives.  See the things of this world as Jesus sees them: False.  Puffed up.  Loud.  Arrogant.  Harmful.  Hopeless.

And, so, the wisest of women builds her house.  Her sphere of influence.  She trusts that God will meet her needs in unexpected ways.  Putting herself in His care, she is free.  To leave old ways behind.  Serve husband and children.  Encourage.  Build up.

May I — and all the women in my life — be like the adulterous woman who sat at the feet of Jesus.  Sins exposed and forgiven.  Eyes open.  The foolishness of the temporary exchanged for the wisdom of the eternal.

No longer foolish, may we be a refuge.  Our light burning brightly.  Our homes a welcoming place.

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Squelch Pride, Return to Word

Posted in Biblical manhood & womanhood, Culture Shifts, Faith & Practice, Life issues, Parenting & Education, Sexy or holy?, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 14, 2011| Leave a Comment »

A friend of mine has been trying to get the attention of her church.   Today, after nearly 14 years, God made it possible for her to speak to a small group of church leaders.  To make her plea.  To provide well-documented evidence giving justified reasons for her concern.  I prayed for listening ears.  Open hearts and minds.

I share my friend’s concern.  Motivation.  Perseverance.  Our experiences are different, but our conclusion the same.  That is:  Christians have been taken captive to the ways of modern sex education.  Nowhere in Scripture does God say to “educate in sex.”  He does tell parents to “instruct” in “purity.”  Guard the innocence of youth.  Mentor Biblical manhood and womanhood.   I want the church to be distinctively different from the world.  As it should be.  But, making this request of the institutional church is costly.  My friend knows.  She and her family have paid a high price.

I, too, recognize the cost.  Involvement.  Thirty years of researching, serving on boards and committees, writing, traveling the country, meeting with young and old,  listening to people suffering a wrong choice, and being a voice of hope.  Those who didn’t understand thought me odd.  Well-meaning folk suggested I “lighten up.”  But, the more I contrasted the world with God’s Word, the more convicted I became.  I couldn’t “lighten up.”  Not when boys and girls have their innocence stripped from them.   Not when educators try to wrap Jesus around Kinsey.  Not when parents or grandparents who’ve suffered the consequences of worldly ideology ask for my help in warning a younger generation.  But, pointing out an error in teaching troubles the teacher.   No one wants to hear that wrong teaching, no matter how well-intentioned or Gospel-wrapped, hurts children.  Makes them more vulnerable.   The whistle-blower risks being called a fool.  A simpleton.  Out of step.  There is much resistance.

Why?  Perhaps the greatest reason is pride.  Years ago, while serving on a sanctity of life task force, I was given opportunity to meet with men of influence.  I expressed concern that legalized abortion had greased the slope to euthanasia and offered documentation of the growing acceptance among Christians of “mercy killing” and “assisted suicide.”  I was silenced by a kindly church leader who told me not to concern myself.  His words were like a pat on the knee.  “You’re just a homemaker,” he said.  “You let us take care of this.”

Pride.  The pride of education.  Position.  Initials before or behind one’s name.  But, the saying is true: Pride goes before the fall.  It certainly did in the Garden of Eden.

The day came when I was confronted by a church “expert” on all things pertaining to sex.  He stood with arms crossed.  Feet planted.  Taller than me.  “So,” he said.  “I understand you have concerns about my work.”  Who was I to respond to him?  Would he, a driving force behind Christian sex education, listen to a homemaker?  A mom?  A lay-person?  His stature was intimidating, but I managed one small request.  “Please.” I said, “Guard the boundaries of modesty.  Teach what it means to be a boy or a girl first… before educating in sex.”

Pride puts well-meaning people on the defense.  Even after a “good” person has been deceived, pride says, “Hey!  I know what I’m doing here.  And, because I’m a Christian, I will do right.”  Well, that’s what Chuck Colson said before he was neck-deep in Watergate.  In his new DVD series, Doing the Right Thing, Colson admits to thinking that because he was a Christian, he couldn’t be deceived.  Couldn’t fall to wrong choices.  That’s a different sort of pride, isn’t it?  Is this also true for Christians who associate with the theory of sex education?

It isn’t that that Christian leaders want to do wrong.  They simply do what they should not and don’t do what they should.  (Sound familiar?)  Perhaps these leaders believe themselves Christian enough to stand strong.  To sort the good from the bad.   But, the deceiver is always at work.  Deception comes at the university, in study groups, on the internet, at the coffee-house,  and in animated discussion with intelligent but secular friends.   Well-intentioned Christians can actually be duped into wrapping Jesus around worldly ideology.  Sophistication.  Progressivism.  But, the Word doesn’t wrap around the world.  Jesus doesn’t… won’t… can’t wrap Himself around the world.  Jesus is the Way and the Truth and the Life.  He is Light upon the world’s darkness.

A “good” Christian leader knows this.  But, pride is an ugly monster.  As pride swells, we dig in.  We go on the defense even as we begin to feel the prick of conscience.  There is guilt when one realizes that something intended to be straight was built on a crooked foundation.  When wrong teaching or practice has coursed its way through curricula, workshops, conferences, sermons, counseling sessions, books, and media.

But, most amazingly, there is hope.  There is always hope, even in the midst of error and sin.  In humility we are strengthened by the Spirit of God who lives in us.  We can allow the alarm to sound.  We can express shame and regret.  We can apologize for wrong teaching.  We can ask for and receive forgiveness.

We can squelch pride and return to the Word.

For related topics, see “Jesus Doesn’t Wrap “Silly Myths”  (10-1-10), “1988” (1-22-11), “The Body is Our House” (1-24-11), “Damage Control,” (1-26-11), “Choices Affect Our Attitude Toward God” (2-9-11), “Too Long at the Animal Circus” (3-23-11), “Unhooked and Set Free” (5-17-11), “Unhooked: Part II” (5-18-11), “Men and the Monogamy Molecule” (5-18-11), and “Were Moms Hooked, Too?” (5-18-11)

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